A new book, Born Trump: Inside America’s First Family is coming out soon but an excerpt has already been published in Vanity Fair. It details how Ivanka in particular “seized on the opportunity” presented by Trump’s presidential win, complete with stars in her eyes about becoming American royalty.
After her father surprised the whole world by winning the election, Ivanka was apparently excited to have her “princess moment”. One of Ivanka’s friends apparently said, “I told her it’s an inauguration, not a coronation.” Rather than look up those words in a dictionary, Ivanka plowed ahead and insisted on the inauguration parade, interested in the pageantry and symbolism of the occasion – and her “princess moment”. Fox explains, “The sentiment was that Americans wanted a royal family.”
And the American people would choose the Trump family if they really did want a royal family? The Trumps, following Donald’s lead, seem to ignore the fact that Donald Trump did not win the popular vote. As well, there would be a few (dozen!) better alternatives if this was really the case.
“The Trumps have somewhat fancied themselves as a modern version of the Kennedys,” Fox writes in her book. Sure, except for the serving in a war, engaging in public service and having a vision for the good of the entire country and not being self-absorbed assholes, they are exactly like the Kennedys.
Of her role her Daddy’s new reality, Ivanka “seemed particularly attuned to the stagecraft,” according to Fox, and strategized ways to insert herself into some kind of future White House role during the transition period. Unfortunately, Ivanka hasn’t proven to be that adept at the “stagecraft” she is attuned to – she regularly creates controversy and PR fiascos, as well as becoming notorious for her “tone-deaf” social media posts.
Clearly, Ivanka is only a “princess” to her father.
My question is, when the King is Shit-for-Brains, does it mean you’re Princess Turd?
In a dream a genie came to Ivanka Trump. When the genie asked what Ivanka what she wanted, she asked for a princess moment. The genie grants her wish. Ivanka is taken by the genie to Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington. The entire street is lined with people on both sides, the crowd size in the millions. Ivanka sees people marching in perfect formation. Four people in the parade carry a large picture of Ivanka. The Conversation goes like this:
Ivanka: So this is my “princess moment”?
The Genie: Yes. This is your princess moment Ivanka.
Ivanka: That’s Princess Ivanka.
The Genie: Okay, Princess Ivanka.
Ivanka: Wow. There are a lot of people here. How many people are in
attendance?
The Genie: Oh between 500,000 to over a million.
Ivanka: So all these people are here to see me, America’s Princess?
The Genie: Why yes they are. They want to show their respect for you, “Princess
Ivanka”
Ivanka: So where am I? Like, where am I in this magnificent parade?
The Genie: (Points to a white horse drawn carriage) Why you are riding in the
white carriage as you requested.
Ivanka: (Trying to find herself riding in the carriage) I don’t see myself in the
carriage.
The Genie: I assure you’re riding in luxury in your carriage.
Ivanka: How do I look?
The Genie: Beautiful and elegant, just like a real Princess.
Ivanka: What am I wearing so I can find myself?
The Genie: A white and gold dress designed by Vera Wang with matching heels.
Your hair and makeup have been done perfectly. Everyone who has
you says you look like a sleeping princess!
Ivanka: Sleeping princess? So where am I again?
The Genie: Why in the carriage of course!
Ivanka: (Looks at the carriage again and sees a white and gold casket) I don’t
see myself. All I see is a white and gold casket! I’m supposed to be in
that carriage!
The Genie: I assure you you’re riding in the carriage.
Ivanka: Take me to the carriage! I demand to see myself in my princess moment!
The carriage stops. The genie takes Ivanka to The carriage and opens up the back of the carriage. The genie pulls out the white and gold casket. He opens it. Ivanka sees herself lying in the casket. She’s in her white and gold Vera Wang dress and matching heels. The genie replies: “You wanted a princess moment. Here’s your princess moment.”