Donald Trump loves nothing more than his rally audiences. He loves to perform to a crowd that is totally in his pocket, there to idolize him and nothing more. He lives for it, the roar of the greasepaint, the smell of the crowd.

Trumpty could never pull off most of what he does at a rally in mixed company, meaning any group where there are MAGAs and sane people comingled.

He thinks he’s just the most amusing, adorable, cutting edge comedic talent that there is. If he auditioned with this piece, even for lounges in the Catskills, they’d tell him not to quit his day job. If he did this in Vegas, they’d dump him in Lake Mead.

WTF was that, you ask? We don’t blame you. Here, let’s take a vote. One of these is the right answer, I promise.

  1. Trump taking a dump;
  2. Trump being sodomized by Putin;
  3. Trump trying to do a pull up;
  4. Trump doing his impersonation of a female weight lifter.

Okay, one of those is correct, although if you’re having trouble figuring out which one, that’s understandable, they’re all good answers.

If you said, number four, impersonating a female weight lifter, bing bing bing, you win the prize.

I think the only question to answer, before we all collectively go to fix a stiff drink, is which is the more cringeworthy? This or Trump’s dance moves?

What a flaming sack of shit. And 74 million people voted for four more years of this.

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