Image is everything
You know, the more I see of Trump’s imbecile wingman, Beggar Vance, I finally realized what he reminds me of. When I was a kid, when it would be raining outside, I had a vinyl blow up doll I would take into the basement. It was round, about 5′ high, with a goofy face with a nose with a squeaker in it, and a sand weighted bottom. You’d punch it out, it’d squeak and fall back, then bounce right back up again. I used to kick the living sh*t out of that doll.
And that’s what JD Vance reminds me of. My long ago beloved bop doll. The goofy eyes, the empty drooling smile, and with the media, just like with my long ago doll, no matter how hard you smack him down, he just bounces right back up again with that empty imbecilic smile and waits for more. Where was he back when I was a kid.
Because all else being equal, image matters. If you go to buy a new car, you do your due diligence. MPG, gas tank size, legroom, capacity, trunk capacity. But when it all comes down to the final choice, the one that most looks like it’s going to get you laid on Saturday night is the one you’ll likely drive off the lot.
Looks like Tim Walz is going to get his chance with my bop doll on October 1st. But the funny thing is, by the time they actually ring the bell for round one on the 1st, the result may already be a foregone conclusion. Because every day from now until then, voters are going to continue to see these two, often one after another in video, and that’s going to beg a mental side-by-side comparison. So let’s do our due diligence, shall we?
With Walz, what you see is what you get. And it’s all authentic, there’s no pancake makeup or artifice there. A stocky, short haired, middle age gent, he looks like every football coach you’ve ever had or seen, and the campaign is playing on that by nicknaming him Coach. He has the hoarse, raspy voice of a man used to shouting orders, whether to a platoon of soldiers, or a football field full of players, and having those orderes followed. And when he speaks, his face has the open earnestness that John McCain used to bring to his Straight Talk rallies.
With Beggar Vance what you see is also what you get, and it’s bargain basement. The preppy blow dried hair, the cuticle scissors trimmed beard, the shifty untrustworthy eyes, the fussy fitted and pressed suit, and the wimpy, clipped word method of speech. The other day I realized that it didn’t really matter if JD Vance was born and raised in a hillbilly shack or a Hollywood mansion. He was still going to be the kid that never wore underwear to school because he kept getting wedgies all the time.
Walz exudes an aura of kindness, compassion, honor, and dignity. Vance comes across as the kind of lawyer who shows up with an alligator briefcase in his hand, and a crocodile smile on his face as he knocks on the door to foreclose on the old widow’s home.
When Walz answers a question, it’s in a straightforward, no bullsh*t, common word answer complete with receipts. Like his graven Idol, when Vance answers a question, it’s the first thing that blurts out of his mouth, ignoring a) Whether it actually answers the question, or b) Whether it contradicts something he said an hour ago.
This should be a slam dunk for Walz. In 2022, I watched as much of the then Vance-Ryan Senate debate as I could see on an Ohio public service site. Ryan kicked Vance’s *ss up one side and down the other. And one of Tim Ryan’s shortcomings as a candidate is that he doesn’t have the natural charm and charisma that Walz does.
Normally they say that the VP debates are nothing but a beauty contest. The candidates don’t actually have platforms, they’re pushing their boss’s platform and agenda. It’s kind of like a Coliseum gladiator match, but without the swords and shields. Besides, nobody votes for the VP, they vote for the top of the ticket. And normally that’s true.
But maybe not this time. And once again it’s a case of Trump being hoist on his own petard. This time it’s Trump who is 78 years old, running against a 59 year old. And when you compare these two side-by-side, it begs the question, Do I really want these brainless sh*theels one heartbeat away from the nuclear codes?Â
Vice presidential candidates take the political equivalent of the Hippocratic Oath for doctors, First do no harm. And the way this is shaping up, Beggar Vance may as well be Dr. Typhoid Mary.Â
I thank you for the privilege of your time.
The simple answer is he’s a self important asshole!
I’ve read hillbilly boy was pushed by von shitzinpants’ son (s). That would explain the lack of due diligence. I seriously doubt either of those boys know what that is; quite frankly I doubt von shitzi does either but that was probably a given. But here’s the thing: even if they knew all of the moronic things this fool has said and/or written over the years, he’d still look perfect in their eyes. They do not see writing off 1/2 the population as not worthy of making money to be a bad thing. Not a single one of these fools knows a damned thing about economics and cannot realize the depression this country would enter into were you to remove a large swath of women out of the workforce. Ditto for migrant and illegal workers.
These people make you realize just how ignorant cons are. It is stupefying how little they know and those proj. 1825 dumb-asses are no better. For some reason they think removing half of the workforce, probably more when you consider the 10-20 million people they’re wanting to march off into camps and out of the country, will allow the wealthy to get wealthier and white people will still do Ok (they obviously do not give a happy rat’s ass about people of color). They have no idea how interconnected everything is today. Hell, you likely cannot even manufacture a pencil without order materials from all over the country..all over the world now that I think about it. A world by the way that will look at what is going on over here and perhaps not do business with us. And who is going to make these pencils? They’re taking out the majority of the workforce and what, they think white men are going to do the work? Are you fucking kidding me? Have they taken a good hard look at those incels they mourn about day and night? 400 pound white boys who have spent their entire life on their asses DON’T do anything other than waste their time on a computer which is not conducive to manufacturing anything.
It’s not that these are not smart people, it’s that they are so fucking stupid you have to wonder who ties their shoes in the A.M. Putting every one of these fools up against the wall would raise our collective I.Q. by 20 points.
“Walz exudes an aura of kindness, compassion, honor, and dignity. Vance comes across as the kind of lawyer who shows up with an alligator briefcase in his hand, and a crocodile smile on his face as he knocks on the door to foreclose on the old widow’s home.”
Sorry, Murf, but I think of Vance more along the lines of the host in the “South Park” episode, “Cash for Gold.” The show starts with Stan Marsh and his family visiting his grandfather in a nursing home and his grandfather (who always calls him “Billy”) gives him a bolo tie that he paid $6000 but when Stan tries to sell it (since he doesn’t really care for the tie), he’s offered $15 for the thing (he goes to a Taco Bell and gets offered a “six-layer burrito” and, after the clerk is told “You don’t even sell a six-layer burrito,” he’s offered a “seven-layer burrito” but it’s “as high as” the clerk can go). Stan realizes the home shopping channel is just a rip-off, that buys cheap stuff and then turns around and sells the stuff to seniors at outrageous prices but makes up even higher figures to “sell the bargain price.”
The host of the home shopping channel that appears in the episode is MUCH closer to how I see J D Vance–selling crap to the rubes that they’re all too willing to buy, even when he doesn’t completely buy his own spiel.