Ring Out This Annus Horribilus With Hilarious Political Limericks

Laughter is the best medicine, we are told. So let’s begin to say goodbye to 2024, a miserable year that certainly did not work out the way we’d planned. Best laid plans and all that. It’s New Year’s Eve Eve for a few more hours and then we begin the last day of a year that I hope we don’t have to repeat. It’s not just the election going south, although that is certainly the worst thing to happen this year. Google did some strange machination earlier in the year regarding how its search function works. Whatever practical effect they intended it to have, I can tell you the net effect on smaller blogs like this one: We’ve lost a lot of money this year. Couple that with the lost election and traffic crashing and we’re not doing so great. If anybody reading this can afford to donate a few dollars, it would be greatly appreciated.

And there’s always the next year, right? We have to think positively and get in a good mind set for 2025. Time to count our blessings for what we do have. And again, I repeat from yesterday, I am so grateful that it was Jimmy Carter’s time to pass on Sunday while there is still time for Joe Biden to honor him properly in Washington. President Biden will deliver President Carter’s eulogy, as Carter requested him to do. So as we prepare for things to come, here are comical limericks and a writing contest from Charlie Sykes.

Feel free to entertain your fellow revelers tomorrow night with some of these limerick tributes to the year that was. They come from one of our exceptionally talented readers, who for modesty’s sake, prefers to remain both mysterious and anonymous.

Matt

There once was a guy named Matt Gaetz

Who often would pay for his dates

So his life came unglued

Because everyone knew

That his morals were not his best traits.

**

Steve

There once was a guy named Steve Bannon

Who shot off his mouth like a cannon

But the feds caught a whiff

Of the gentleman’s grift

Which displayed his addiction to Mammon

**

First lady

Melania married for money

And thought that the outlook was sunny

But the man that she chose

Is a blow hard, God knows,

And her life with him’s really not funny.

**

Vivek

We all know Vivek Ramaswamy

Whose logic is like origami

He creases and folds

With inventions so bold

Our heads start to pound like…tympani.

**

Elon

We did not elect Elon Musk

Who isn’t a guy you can trust

But his manner with Trump

And his cadre of chumps

Makes them think that he’s David Dean Rusk

**

RFK

Trump’s nominee RFK junior

Pretends to defend the consumer

But a worm in his brain

Seemed to drive him insane

Now his intellect’s only a rumor

**

He says he is anti-vaccine,

And that immunization’s obscene

His polio plan

Is to impose a ban

Making iron-lung tech more routine.

**

Melania

Of glamorous dreams she had many,

But of love felt Melania not any

Still, her life became fraught

when despite what she’d thought

She really had earned every penny

**

(If you are inspired to write your own — or think you can do better — send them to me or simply post them in the comments. The author of the Winning Limerick will receive a lifetime paid membership to “To the Contrary.”)

You can hit the hotlink in the second paragraph above to go to Charlie’s newsletter and submit a piece. I don’t know if you have to be a subscriber to participate. Or, you can post a limerick here and I’m a subscriber, so I’ll pass it on to Charlie for you — and if you win, you get the lifetime membership.

Get the creative juices flowing. And put the champagne on ice. Time to put all this dreariness behind us and get into a positive mind set for 2025. Remember, 2026 is the year we make a strong comeback. We’ve been down this road before and made it happen, we can and will do it again.

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