The New York Times broke the news at 1:22 PDT that Jeffrey Epstein did in fact die of suicide, quashing conspiracy theories that he was murdered.

The official results of an autopsy showed that the financier Jeffrey Epstein killed himself in his Manhattan jail cell, the city’s medical examiner’s office said on Friday, determining that the cause of death was suicide by hanging.

The determination came six days after Mr. Epstein, 66, was found dead in his cell at the Metropolitan Correctional Center in Manhattan, where he was awaiting trial on federal sex trafficking charges.

Guards on their morning rounds found Mr. Epstein at about 6:30 a.m. on Saturday, prison officials said. He appeared to have tied a bedsheet to the top of a set of bunk beds, then knelt toward the floor with enough force that he broke several bones in his neck, officials said.

As of the time of this writing, still no word on the toxicology screen or the closed-circuit television cameras in the jail.


Help keep the site running, consider supporting.


  1. I was thinking part of the reason he did this was to hurt his victims, who dared to fight back. I hope they get justice and peaco of mind. Or his money, they deserve whatever restitution they can get.

  2. ‘ quashing conspiracy theories’
    Oh, if it was only as easy as that.
    They’re barely just getting started, the incompetence of Dimwit Donny’s maladministration, and, of course, his direct input, strengthening them.

    • Like what exactly? This is as close to a definitive answer as we’re going to get, barring any curveballs from toxicology or the cams (which I fully expect will be a grand total of nothing). I’ve often found the real world to be far less sexy, far more random and way more absurd than any CT could hope to be.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

The maximum upload file size: 128 MB. You can upload: image, audio, video, document, spreadsheet, interactive, text, archive, code, other. Links to YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and other services inserted in the comment text will be automatically embedded. Drop files here