I’d already seen news about this guy after his sentencing, but this evening I again saw an article from Raw Story about CONVICTED Oath Keeper Joe Biggs.  Last week Biggs was sentenced to 17 years in prison (way short of the federal sentencing guidelines recommendation but that’s another issue) and he of course isn’t happy.  But he’s optimistic.  He believes Trump’s going to pardon him and his cohorts.  He got to talk to Alex Jones on Infowars (how the hell is Jones still out there spewing his tinfoil hat crap?) and as the article notes said:

“Oh, I know he’ll pardon us,” Biggs told Jones. “I believe that with all my heart.”

Hmmm.  I seem to recall Trump having a couple of weeks between Jan. 6 and Inauguration Day when he could have pardoned you Joe.  And the rest of your pals in the Oath Keepers and the Proud Boys.  All of you.  And anyone else who took part in the insurrection riot.  At the very least he could have pardoned the top leadership of your gang of criminals who aren’t looking so “proud” these days.  Same with your counterparts over in the Oath Keepers.  But he didn’t.

Trump waited until after the election to do so, but he did pardon the likes of Paul Manafort, Steve Bannon, Roger Stone and Mike Flynn.  AFTER the election.  Makes one think Trump knew it would be unpopular.  Not so big a deal for several of those asshats but Manafort was actually in prison and having to wait was I’m sure quite the chore for him!   However, the point remains.  You Joe, and some of the other leaders who coordinated with Trump’s folks that surrounded him and kept him in the loop on what was set of that infamous day should be pissed.  Trump could have signed pardons before heading to Andrews for his last ride on the Presidential jet and had them walked over to the WH Counsel’s office, or messengered to the DOJ.

He didn’t!

Yet you and it seems others are convinced that the day will come when Trump does actually pardon you.  Look, I’ve had some crazy dreams/fantasies in my six and a half decades. Becoming an astronaut even after the first moon landing when I’d already grown too tall and was still growing.  The Cubs playing in the World Series (ok, so that one actually happened), playing major league baseball, making the Olympic basketball team, becoming a featured bass-baritone in the Metropolitan Opera Company.  I could keep going but you get the point.  All of them were fantastic dreams and deep down I knew for whatever (valid) reason they’d never happen. (I still sometimes wake up thinking the Cubs didn’t actually win the World Series – that it has been a years long sick joke)

Still, Biggs (and others) are counting a pardon from Trump.  And seem delusional enough to believe it will happen.  However, there’s some problems with that Joe.  First, Trump would have to get back into the WH.  Fat chance.  Second, he’d have to care enough to make good on his wishy washy promise you think he made.  As the Raw Story noted Trump has complained about the treatment he and others have gotten over Jan. 6 but in May when specifically pressed on the issue of pardons was noncommittal:

“I don’t know. I’d have to look at their case” Trump said.  “But I will say in Washington, D.C., you cannot get a fair trial. You cannot – just like in New York City you can’t get a fair trial.”

Now, some are saying that once Trump doesn’t have to worry about re-election he won’t care what anyone thinks and will hand out pardons like his WH Doctor now Congress Critter Ronny Jackson (to be his Surgeon General?) handed out pills.  That’s debatable and I won’t tackle it here.  However, for the here and now record I’ll say that once the insurrection failed and the Electoral Vote count was completed Biggs and all the rest who attacked the Capitol got relegated to “Coffee Boy” status.  Meaning having failed Trump and proving not to be of use to him cast aside.  IF remembered at all maybe as someone who’d bring in fresh pots of coffee to the actual important people around Trump.  (Diet Cokes for him of course rates special person status for him)

Well, as the title suggests I want to focus on that first thing I said has to happen for Biggs’ fantasy to become reality.  Trump getting re-elected.  Let’s imagine election night in November, 2024 and a Biden Trump rematch.  GOPers will play every dirty trick in the book but if Trump is the GOP nominee it will be over before midnight.  Maybe within an hour of polls closing out west.

I long ago lost interest in college basketball but used to follow it closely including the “Selection Sunday” show for the NCAA’s March Madness.  I happen to have graduated from a “mid major” school that at one time sweated out those Sundays waiting to see if the Salukis would make it into the tournament.  Every year, we see scenes of “bubble teams”, teams that anxiously sit their waiting as each Regional bracket is revealed to see if they got a bid, if they mad the “Big Dance.”  Sometimes you see reactions like in the title pic.  And sometimes devastation on the faces of those who’s dreams get dashed.

So wouldn’t it be great TV for networks to send a crew to prisons where Biggs and other convicts are serving sentences?  And live stream them watching election returns?  And the look on their faces when the “Biden WINS!” banner shows up on the screen?  (A still photographer would be good too)  I for one would much rather watch the crushed look on the faces of Biggs and others as they realize NO pardon is out there for them.

It seems like every day I come up with a new mean-spirited idea when it comes to these sorry excuses for human beings.  Still, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit both to thinking them up and sharing them with others.


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  1. Super idea regarding your “… wouldn’t it be great TV for networks to send a crew to prisons where Biggs and other convicts are serving sentences? And live stream them watching election returns? And the look on their faces when the “Biden WINS!” banner shows up on the screen? (A still photographer would be good too)…” It’d be the dogs bollocks to watch how stewed they’d become, in their own misery and realisation that the consequences of living the truth hurts, in more ways than one.

    • Well, first Trump has to come out of the GOP convention as the nominee. I think odds are still okay for him but not a lock. He’s likely to be convicted in at least one jurisdiction by then and maybe two depending on when Fani Willis can put him on trial and how long that case will take. A federal conviction and a state one in a state where he’s unlikely to get a pardon will create chaos and TV network bosses creaming their jeans over a BROKERED convention. Far uglier than I saw as a kid up in Chicago in 1968. As a native of southern Illinois over three hundred miles from Chicago I’m glad to have been well away from all that mess!

      However, if he heads into the convention as the presumptive nominee BUT also as a convicted felon I think all bets are going to be off. Floor fights (literal fights) in states delegations with people refusing to allow their state to give their votes to a felon. How many days will it go on? Even if Trump comes out of hit with the nomination the GOP will, all the way down to the county/local level be in for an electoral bloodbath. Which would as I say make for some fun TV on election night when Biggs et al finally realize their boy is NOT going to be able to hand down a pardon. (Even if he were inclined to do so)

    • They failed. The Electoral Votes were counted and Biden’s win was certified per Constitutional Requirements. Having failed him, Trump lost any interest in helping any of the rioters the moment he got the news that Congress had completed the certification. That’s why none of them got pardons before he left office, and why even if there is a God and one who likes tossing turds into the U.S. punchbowl Trump gets back in the WH he won’t pardon any of them in the future. He’ll have spent a fortune on legal fees just to stay out of jail and he’ll blame having to spend every legal dollar on those guys for failing him on Jan. 6.


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