In a new article in Axios today, they reported that surprise!, Twitter engineers had rigged their default For You cover page to basically act as a tweet dumpster for anything Elon Musk belches out. But if what they’re reporting is even half true, if I were Musk, I might not want to quite so prominent so that people can see that a twit he is.
For example, and this is the 2nd funniest thing in the article. According to Axios, in a recent stock option offering for the double handful of actual humans who still occupy the building every day, Musk reportedly listed the value of Twitter as $20 billion. Which would have me pocketing my checkbook immediately, since the silly bastard actually paid $44 billion for that boondoggle less than six months ago!
Look, I’m no accountant, but you don’t have to be one to quickly see that there is no way that Elon Musk can come out of this looking like anything but a world class Schmuck! Either Musk is the world’s most imbecilic tycoon, “donating” $50 to a Hare Krishna for a $20 book at the airport, or he actually bought a $44 billion company, and in less than six months, has frittered through more than half of the company’s stock value. There is no 3rd logical option, and either of the 1st two have you wondering if his parents didn’t bank his allowance when he was a kid.
And while it’s hysterical to see that pompous overstuff ass with his pants down, taking a paddling over the fence rail, it’s not funny for Musk. Because one of the things he had to do to make the purchase was to collateralize some of his personal shares in Tesla as insurance. And the Tesla board is already rather displeased with him according to reporting, and the last thing he needs to have to do is to start selling off his shares, weakening his control of the board.
And like any other nitwit who has no idea of what he’s doing, Musk is trying to use a wad of chewed bubble gum to fix a burst pipe;
- Twitter announced that starting on April 15th, only subscribed users will be able to have their tweets appear in the default For You stream on the main page. If they can elbow Musk out of the way
- They also announced that effective on April 1st, only subscribed users will be eligible to possess those little blue verified user checkmarks on their tweets. On that date, anybody who was verified under the previous regime will lose their blue checks until they do the right thing
- Twitter is taking these steps simply because their subscription revenue isn’t even leaving a coffee stain on their bottom line yet. Like Trump with his POS Bullshit Social platform, Musk is learning the hard way that while people will look for free, they’re not about to shell out any long green for the privilege
And this duct tape patch job is pleasing neither shareholders nor industry analysts. After all, Twitter’s entire reputation and street creds are as a true global market square, free to all. The more Musk holds people up with subscription fees, add-on charges, and minimalizing their tweets, the more disgruntled global users they shed, and risk their reputation.
However, most analysts are taking this with a cow lick sized grain of salt. Simply because they’ve been burned before. Musk has a nasty habit of making grand Twitter proclamations about service changes, and then the changes never occur, occur but are delayed without explanation, or occur on time and then almost immediately go off of the railings. These guys will believe it when they see it.
But here’s the biggest reason why Musk is such an egotistical moron. Almost all of Musk’s changes since he took over were to make Twitter A true bastion of free speech! Which of course means more neo-Nazi’s, racists, and far right domestic terrorists. Which leaves everybody else either keeping their heads down, or like me, ditching the site entirely. And these ass clowns ain’t paying any subscription fees either, you can bet on that.
But in pandering to all of the rest of these two-legged-stools, Musk is failing to pander to the ones he needs the most to finally plug the leaks and start baling water again. Paid Advertisers! And as long as Twitter is chock-a-block full of Nazi’s and racists, the big ticket advertisers are avoiding Twitter like the kid with cooties. And any one of those big ticket advertisers would be worth all of his subscribers, and then some.
And true to my word, I saved the best for last. because the article contained information negative to Twitter, before going to publication the author e-mailed the media inquiries department with a copy of the article, and a request for comment. The auto generated reply was a smiley turd. And so Elon Musk, for being a world class business idiot, as well as a world champion lowlife, Stand up and take a bow, FOOL!
Inherited wealth has a tendency to produce idiots. I never understood Musk’s reputation as a “genius.” He didn’t develop Tesla, he bought it as an existing company. His takeover of Twitter has been a shitshow from before the deal went through. He paid too much, tried to back out before learning he hadn’t given himself an off-ramp in his offer, didn’t do any due diligence, etc. The only people who come out of this looking smart are the stockholders who sold at the inflated price.
Entitled apartheid baby with emeralds. Not quite Lucy in the sky is he?
But it’s all bloody business, huh? The price of capitalism.
what is this site going to do about twitter? I don’t have a twitter account, many of the posts on my phone are just blank squares with a frown face. I like this site, but I am concerned the twitter will impact reliability.
By his own numbers trashed more than half Twitter’s value in three months, and has been drawing down his equity in Tesla to keep the thing afloat. And he’s facing an absolute collapse of his empire if things get nasty with China and his supply chain collapses. When customers wake up to the reality, they’ll be looking elsewhere for their new EV and its into the spiral for Elon.
he overpaid in the first place, and THEN started burning through the business. I seriously doubt even the 20 billion figure by now.
What goes up must come down.
Musk is an idiot and 3 years from now won’t be on any “wealthiest ” lists anymore.
Just like William Crapo Durant…..
This is just one more example of what the fuck is wrong with our country and capitalism in general. Twitter, f.b., and all that other bullshit are on the same level as crypto and N.F.T.’s. They have no REAL value; it has all been pulled out of someone’s ass. After the shit is pulled out of their asses they market it as if it has actual value even tho’ there is nothing there. S.M. doesn’t help humans do one g_d-damned single thing. Say what you want about Gates and Jobs, they created things–computers or operating systems, something F.F.S.
I do have to hand it the people creating or marketing s.m.–they saw “idiot” written on folks’ heads and saw $$$’s for the taking.
I never see any of Elon Musk’s tweets. Why? Because I blocked him back when he bought Twitter. His engineers can do what they like; his brain-farts will never waft past me. He might as well be wearing triple-strength charcoal underwear filters. I’d advise any other Twitter users to do the same – or leave Twitter entirely.