How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if it wasn’t busy dining on Paul Ryan’s SUV? New York Times:
“They [mechanics] realized that a family of woodchucks lived in the underbody of my Suburban and they ate all the wiring out of it,” he [Ryan] said. “And so my car was eaten by animals, and it’s just dead. I had to call the insurance company. So I don’t have a car.” […]
Though Mr. Ryan’s sport utility vehicle may have been ruined, he was at least spared an encounter with a more alarming intruder like the timber rattlesnake found underneath the hood of a car in Hancock, N.Y., last month, or the bear that got stuck inside of a Subaru Outback at Lake Tahoe, forcing a sheriff’s deputy to smash a window (and run) so it could escape.
It is unclear what measures Mr. Ryan might take to prevent rodents from feasting on his next vehicle (he is considering getting a pickup truck, the Ford F-150) after he retires from the House at the end of the year.
It could be worse, Paul. You could have a flesh eating bacteria in your house, a herd of rabid raccoons in the backyard and the IRS coming to seize all assets that you aren’t physically wearing. So cheer up.
