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The Very Funny Translation of House Oversight Hearing into Plain-Speak – Part 1 Opening Statements
As translated by Eric Garland, Chairwoman Carolyn Maloney announces the transition to the second phase of the hearing, question time.
MALONEY: OK. You guys ready? This ain’t gonna be gentle. Buckle up.
Maloney begins the questioning.
WRAY: Never heard of it.
MALONEY: Parler contacted you 50 times.
WRAY: Um. I heard there was a Parler that contacted a maybe sorta field office and we've been looking at some Parler, um, stuff.
As far as Norfolk goes, it was raw intel, so…
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
Eric adds this note to Wray’s response:
Tips are raw intel by definition, so…this is a weird statement. It’s the size of the collection of similar bits of raw intel that will allow an assessment by analysts.
MALONEY: Are you going to study the failures and report it to us or what?
WRAY: sure?
MALONEY: Can you have this done in two weeks?
WRAY: It's kinda tricky. We're busy investigating the attackers now. Judges may not like the publicity. pic.twitter.com/EtpA5QUupb
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
While it’s reasonable to suppose that judges will not want any publicity that may taint a future jury, Wray may well have another reason for not keeping Congress well informed. Both the House and Senate are harboring seditious activists and sympathizers who are set to be swept up in the joint FBI-DoJ investigation. Understandably, neither Wray nor Garland will not want them to have any inside information before indictments are issued.
Back at the hearing the baton is being passed to Virginia Foxx (R-NC). She seems confused about who she should be questioning. Possibly it’s because the hearing concerns the January 6 insurrection which she is not supposed to be talking about. In a futile effort to deal with her befuddlement, she first asks the whereabouts of an acting police chief who wasn’t requested to appear at the hearing, then passes on her confusion to FBIDir Wray.
FOXX: Here are complicated questions I want a single word answer to. Please describe the prosecution of all 500 people that the DOJ is doing in a single word.
WRAY: Um. Huh?
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
She follows up with another futile effort, this time an attempt to give Moscow Mike’s bro some cover by pointing out that he’s not a member of the Capitol Police. This is a strange and roundabout way of trying to pin the entire intelligence failure on the absent acting police chief.
FOXX: I am totally not trying to pin the fault of this on acting Chief Pittman instead of Trump's goons.
HOLMES-NORTON (D-Douglass Commonwealth): Maybe we should have statehood so we can call out our own National Guard? Maybe having three layers of chain of command doesn't work.
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
Rep Holmes-Norton doesn’t get to say much but she hits the bullseye whenever she does.
Jody Hice (R-GA) employs the new GQP policy regarding law and order: instead of supporting law enforcement, they now declare they like the law – though it quickly becomes apparent that they’re very picky about which laws they like.
HICE: Black Lives Matter and Antifa destroyed America! What about the Left! The Liberal Media
ok fuck this guy I can't even
I'm waiting for the next guy.
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
Our translator thankfully gives up on Hice so we are spared further right-wing nutjob rantings.
Next up it’s a return to sanity with Rep Stephen Lynch (D-MA).
LYNCH: Again, did you deploy the National Guard on Jan 6 to *other places in D.C. that were not, for example, THE CAPITOL?*
PIATT: We needed different color hats that day.
LYNCH: You tried to send the National Guard to the Arbor Day Monument instead, didn't you?
[holy shit]
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
What the…! And Piatt can’t come back from this ruinous revelation. It was either a monumental blunder or a deliberate delay. Either way, lives were at stake. It’s one helluva gobsmacking revelation.
GROTHMAN (R-WI06): Isn't it true, Director Wray, that many of the people who invaded the Capitol only to *watch* Congress get murdered, which technically isn't breaking the law!
WRAY: Actually that's against the law too.
GROTHMAN: You didn't arrest them, did you? That's mean! pic.twitter.com/qnl9GTcIlr
— Eric Garland (@ericgarland) June 15, 2021
And we finish part 2 with Grothman taking a strong dislike to laws and law enforcement that focus on arresting GQP’s batshit crazy following. Just more of the same old we’ve come to expect from this criminal enterprise parading as a political party.
The final instalment is here:
GQP Fools and More Stunning Revelations at House Oversight Hearing – Part 3 The Questioning Continues
Grothman, the Capitol was CLOSED TO THE PUBLIC that day. Including to armed tourists.
Actual reality makes no difference to their stories, does it. When it comes time to indict the elected GQPers who were in on the planning and incitement and/or those who aided, abetted and/or gave comfort to the insurrectionists, I wonder how many of them will still be telling the same lies in court?