For reasons known only to Team Trump, the convicted felon and presumptive GOP nominee is not out campaigning in swing states and he’s got this surrogate rally going on today at Staten Island. Rudy Giuliani may be the keynote speaker but it’s hard to tell because nobody is paying the slightest bit of attention to him. At least when he spoke in the Four Seasons Landscaping parking lot the cameras and mics were trained on him. Not so today. Today he’s wedged in with other convicts comparing Juan Merchan to other judges they’ve appeared before in their lives of professional crime. The rally is just as nutty as it sounds. And then there is the metaphor from the highway, a runaway Trump Store bus that lost its parking brake (or something) and stampeded down the hill until it crashed into a light pole.

Now there is a horrifying thought. Donald Trump, an immortal being and eternal personality? Who knows? Maybe this is how it is in the Universe Below. Satan is the Father, Trump is the Son, and MAGA is the Holy Stupid.

Rudy might as well not be up there at all. Nobody’s listening, they’re all talking to one another. I wonder if Team Trump is paying Rudy to appear?

Always good to hear from the experts, right? Maybe Trump could hold his next rally at Riker’s Penitentiary. There’s nothing but convicted felons there and they can share their experience, strength and hope with newcomer Trump.

Now as to the bus and Jesus losing the wheel. Some people on Twitter are saying that the bus was “way lost” on the other side of the island and maybe the driver(s) got out to figure out how to get to the right place and didn’t set the brake.

Last time there was a screw up this comical it took place between a porn shop and a crematorium. And Rudy was there as well. Rudy Giuliani always seems to be the disheveled, intoxicated supernatural being that appears and hovers around these major signs and wonders in the Trump saga. Who knows? Maybe when Rudy officiates a disaster another devil gets his horns.

 

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6 COMMENTS

  2. “but there’s one thing I know
    though I’m younger than you…
    that even Jesus would never
    forgive what you do.” Bob Dylan Masters of War

    4

  3. Don John should have got St Matthew to do his books for him.

    For those who don’t know it, St Matthew worked for the Roman/Judean IRS and is the patron saint of accountants, bankers, bookkeepers, security guards, and stockbrokers.

    4

  4. hands and feet of their jeebus hmm? who knew jeebus was such a filthy s.o.b. Oh, wait, we Jews knew quite a bit about him and did NOT call him anything close to moshiach.

    As for the stoopie f*cks wanting Von Shitzinpants to take them with him to jail: pull another dumb-ass j-6 stunt and a prison sentence is the best outcome you’ll be able to expect. This time I hope there are armed forces ready to rid us of the dumbest mother-f*ckers on the planet. You want to know the difference between Kent State and these idiots? The Kent State kids were educated and were likely to make useful contributions to society while the magats are quite uneducated and extremely unlikely to make any useful contributions to society. Should the s.c. morons get off their asses and issue that oh so magical immunity, I expect President Biden to use it and use it well.

    Von Shitzi got his just desserts FINALLY. Let’s hope this is just the beginning of what could be a very long time in prison given his OTHER felonies.

    3

    • I doubt that the s.c. morons will issue that oh so magical immunity until it is too late for President Biden to use it. Like if dfg happens to steal the election and just before he is sworn in. God help us! Vote blue!!

      3

  5. I’m not sure about God but trump has convinced me about Satan. On the lighter side, throughout history there have been people who have had the answers to life’s BIG questions. Let’s jump into a wormhole for a look back at our future, which thankfully doesn’t seem to remember him.

    3

  6. Maybe the bus was just trying to commit suicide? It had had enough of toting all the hypocritical bumper stickers and placards.

    We all know the aphorism, “Everything Trump touches dies.” Who would’ve thought it applied to inanimate objects as well?

    6

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