Trump Announces ‘Trump Phone’ – Omits Impending FCC Makeover

Trump’s eldest sons Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump unveiled the “Trump Mobile” entity, which will have a monthly talk, text and data plan and its own phone.

Called the “47 plan,” the monthly mobile service will start at $47.45 before taxes and fees, a reference to Trump being the U.S.’ 45th and 47th president, according to the Trump Mobile website.

$47.45 per month – get it? Hardy-Har-Har…retch and puke.  With most carriers that amount would carry unlimited service but this is Trump we’re talking about so the lack of details on what a person gets in the ‘basic monthly plan’ is kind of interesting.  The phones themselves will cost $499. That’s for the basic model which will we’re told have an American Flag on the back and some type of Trump branding.

There are already Trump phone cases for all manner of mobile phones.  It will be interesting to see whether the option of purchasing a “Trumpier” phone case will be offered or if Trump will make people shell out extra bucks for a Trump phone that’s more ‘Trump-blinged-out.  I’m better on the latter and woe to anyone who creates their own Trump phone case! At least not without cutting Trump in on say 80% of the profits. He’s got Bondi and the entire DOJ that will sue them into oblivion!

I mentioned the FCC in the title because Trump STILL harbors dreams of being a dictator.  For those who don’t know, in some country where a coup takes place along with installing the new leader in the ‘big office’ (killing the old one when needed) is taking over TV and radio. ONLY the new “leader” gets to decide what goes out over the airwaves.  In this day and age it would require also taking over cell phone/wireless networks and installations.  The new dictator that already has their own cell phone network with a third or more of the population already signed up and using his service would be in a better position than any dictator before has ever been!

Trump as we know is aware most mobile devices are manufactured overseas.  Fredo’s #1 and #2 (Don Jr. and Eric) insist Trump phones will be made here in the U.S. but I for one can’t see Trump shelling out the kind of money for a factory that could produce them. No, at most there will be a some building that’s really just sort of a TV/Movie set that LOOKS like people are making cell phones.  The actual phones  he sells will be made overseas. What matters is the other brands are already being slapped with tariffs. Expect those to go through the roof. Meanwhile when it comes to service, Trump can order the FCC to take away the license of any other carrier to operate.

If only the Trump mobile network is allowed that means he gets control over everyone’s phone and wireless devices!  Think about that. Also think about the fact Trump will fire any and everyone at federal agencies that stand in his way. If he orders FCC Commissioners to strip other carriers of operating licenses and their bandwidth and any refuse he’ll just fire them. Being Trump, he’s at a point where he’d order any who dare to sue him rounded up (their loved ones too) and shipped to Gitmo.

Ok, I’ve gone a good ways down the rabbit hole on this. But can you blame me? Trump is MAJOR butt-hurt right now. His big birthday bash at the WH where he was going to “joke” about how impressive his ‘saving Los Angeles’ and the country joining his celebratory ‘Perade’ meant he might as well be recognized as the King everyone knows him to be.

Alas he face-planted Saturday. His misuse of the Army was a sad spectacle to see. So much so Trump and the others with him on his viewing stand were openly miserable at how lame and low energy it was. The stands along the route were at best only half full and even across from the WH you could see not throngs of cheering MAGA but bigly chuck of grass/open space.  Worse, even with political assassinations in Minnesota dominating the news people showed up in droves almost everywhere else at No King marches and/or rallies, Easily more than a million people. Oh, and there was a big one across the river in Alexandria, VA where a featured participant was a former Commander of the National Guard.

So, by the time his big parade started ole Don-Old knew his 79th birthday wouldn’t be capped off by his triumphantly signing an order invoking the Insurrection Act.  Then he had to hurry up to…Canada of all places because it’s their turn to host the G7 this year. Having to sit there with world leaders who are competent, who actually know sh*t and who he can see hold him in contempt is more than Trumpty can bear. So he did what he does and tried to change the focus of the news.  In this case the shiny bauble is TRUMP MOBILE.  Ok, so it’s gotten into the news but it’s not dominating it.  There’s still much more news about his failures in the past week and beyond.

I believe the meme makers will have a field day with Trump Mobile and his phones. Hell, I’m a tech luddite and it didn’t take long for me to download images and use a basic microsoft paint program to create the title image.  Yes, MAGAs will jump at the chance to ditch their old phones and phone service for Trump’s new offering. However, I predict it all will turn out to be a sleeker looking version of those old clunker ‘brick phones.’

Yes, I’m mean but I hope that basic $499 phone price comes with a contract to get that $47.45 monthly fee that locks users up for two years of Trump mobile. If not longer. I don’t know about you but I love the likelihood of MAGAs saying to themselves ‘this phone and this phone service suck – I’m switching back to what I used to have’ only to learn they shouldn’t have skipped over the fine print. That they are locked in. Even if the whole enterprise folds (a real possibility) they will still be on the hook for that monthly payment until the end of their contract. If I could insert a picture into a post (help Michelle!) I’d include one I have of a the medieval setting where the guy gestures at his empty field where he grows his f**ks and laments because it’s barren he has ‘No f**ks to give.

***From Ursula*** Zoomers, if you can help the Little Political Blog That Could keep trekking through cyberspace, we would appreciate it. My medical issues are still ongoing. I need to have a minor operation to remove a skin tumor. The hits just keep on coming, like a ’50s radio station. Thank you for all you do. Ursula