Man! Talk about the blind leading the stupid. One of my biggest laughs of the day came from MSNBC, where a reporter had spoken to a GOP House member who was present for the Trump Pep Rally today at the Capitol. When asked how his conversation with Trump had gone, the congressman anonymously replied, “It was like talking to your drunk uncle at the family picnic.” Think about that for a moment. Every one of these quibbled*cks took an oath to the constitution. They all know that Trump is erratic, unstable, and totally unfit to serve, and yet they’re all standing around yes-sir,-yes-sir,-three-bags-fulling. I’m old enough to remember when an oath actually meant something to most people.

Cast your mind back to the 2016 election. In most places we already had early-in-person, absentee, and mail in voting. That’s been around for more than 20 years in most places. And while months before the first ballot was counted, while Trump was already screaming about a rigged election if he lost, he didn’t single out early or vote-by-mail. Maybe because in retiree laden places like Florida and Arizona, the convenience made it an asset for GOP candidates?

2018 was a different kettle of fish. Thanks to Trump’s churlish behavior, and school massacres, the Democrats activated the once largely untapped pool of 18-29 voters, many of whom found early voting convenient, especially away-from-home college students. Trump and the GOP got their asses handed to them in a sling, and the message was received.

Here’s the thing. Long term statistically, early in person and absentee voting actually benefit everybody. As pointed out, in heavy retiree and elderly populations like FL and AZ, the GOP has an edge. But in rust belt and cold weather states, where in person election day voting can be a royal pain in the ass, the Democrats have the edge. But in almost all circumstances, early voting increases turnout across the board, which is good for everybody.

2020 was the paradigm changer. Trump was still stinging over the beatdown he got in 2018 where early and mail in votes really padded the final totals. And as the spring wore on, and the ravages of Covid-19 spread, it became clearer and clearer that 2020 was going to be, bu necessity a largely absentee election. Which could be the kiss of death for a party that prides itself on the tradition of election day voting.

The smart money would have been for the GOP to get up and running a balls-to-the-wall campaign to educate and recommend that voters vote early, and safely from home. But since Trump can’t admit defeat, or even being wrong, his rampant paranoia kicked in, and instead a rabid campaign of Rigged Early Voting! became the battle cry, and voting in person became a bafge of honor for the GOP. It was a disaster, and Traitor Tot knew it when he took to the microphones at 11:30 p.m. on Election Night to declare victory, and demand that all vote counting stop at midnight!

But here’s the thing to remember. Trump’s kamikaze insistence on pure election day voting from GOP voters gave him his frantic last ditch edge. The Big Lie! The election was stolen by millions of invalid mail in ballots! That one issue allowed him to fuel the frenzy through an almost never ending state and federal lawsuits, where he went 1-62. But it allowed him to ram that point home until it became almost religious orthodoxy.

It’s a funny thing about us homo sapiens. We’re a lazy breed. We like convenience. Think back. About 20 years ago, if you wanted a six-pack and some Doritos, you walked up to 7-11 or drove to the store and bought it. Today you flip open your cell phone, and two hours later it’s delivered to your door. Brick-and-mortar stores and chains are going belly up all over the country, simply because it’s easier and more convenient to let Amazon, Target or Walmart to deliver it to your door.

That’s the thing about convenience, once people try it, they like it. And in 2020 they were pretty much forced to try it, and now they love it. And after being force fed it in 2020, they ain’t going back. Which is why the RNC knows that it’s political suicide for His Lowness to continue to demand that the faithful sheeple continue to shlep on out to the gym to vote. They don’t mind voting for a graven idol, but not if they have to suit up and brave the cold if they can do it from home.

And so the pre-dim bulb daughter-in-law RNC started a modest but insistent campaign to educate GOP voters to the convenience and safety of absentee balloting. Of course before they did that, somebody took Il Douche into a dark, quiet room, put a cool damp cloth on his forehead, and explained the facts of life to him with the visual aid of a pop-up book.

And while he doesn’t seem to like it much, he seems to have gotten the memo. He isn’t bitching about the early voting outreach, and while he’s like a kid forcing down his broccoli at dinner to get his chocolate pudding, he’s eating it. And while he won’t go whole hog in yet, in at least some of his scattered rallies, hr’s grumpily extolling the virtues of the convenience, and safety of casting their ballots by mail. One can easily understand the confusion of a bunch of simpletons who have spent the last six years being told that crack cocaine is bad!, now being told to go ahead and pipe down!, but only this one time! Me personally? I wouldn’t buy that sh*t, but let’s see how the sheeple react.

But here’s the McGuffin. Subliminally, and Traitor Tot hopes unnoticed, He’s admitting that The Big Lie! was always nothing more than a steaming pile of dog sh*t. There weren’t millions of illegal mail in ballots. Trump lost the election fair and square, and everything that followed was the whiny bitching of a petulant little brat.

But here’s the part nobody else, especially Trump and the GOP is thinking of. If Trump is behind on election night, or even if he’s ahead, but it’s too close to call, there is no way for him to take to the podium again to claim victory, and demand that the voting stop at midnight. Because he personally told his supporters to vote by mail, and they have the right to have their votes counted! Worse yet, it it turns out that he loses, he can’t even scream about a rigged election!, simply  because he personally assured his voters that mail in voting was easy, safe, secure, and accurate.

Oh, simple facts and logic, even from Traitor Tot’s mouth may not dissuade the slobbering Trombies of his base, but for everybody else he’ll come across as exactly the whiny, petulant, spoiled man child he is. And for a country so Trump weary that they’re ready to pull a Brigadoon, and fall asleep for 100 years until his memory is forgotten, any court filings will be treated as a pathetic joke. Ironically, it would be better if it was the Trump supporters who pulled a Brigadoon and fell asleep for 100 years until they forgot him. Things would be much better in this country by then.

I thank you for the privilege of your time.

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  1. He will say it was stolen anyhow. He doesn’t care about whatever he has said, no matter how many times he said it. All that matters is the lie of the moment.

  2. Even in-person votes are rarely FULLY counted by midnight local time (even if they are, results will not be CONFIRMED by state election officials for a week or more). News organizations typically only “call” an election when there can be little doubt of an outcome (if 96% of stations have been reported–though those numbers are still unofficial–and one candidate has 60% of the vote, the math just won’t allow a mere 4% of stations to deliver 10+% of the vote to the other candidate; usually, the news people have been given an idea of how many mail-in votes exist and those might actually represent the unreported stations or the bulk of the unreported numbers). But every LEGITIMATE news organization or news team will acknowledge that any “call” is subject to verification and certification. With particularly close elections, even in fairly small states, a final count by midnight is all but impossible (especially when there are terms that trigger recounts).
    But Trump simply does NOT have the ability to understand this fact. Someone in his inner circle should put it to him in terms he might understand. If one of his accountants told him one of his businesses showed a yearly profit of $1 billion when it had never shown a yearly profit of more than $100 million, he’d NEED to have those figures checked and rechecked (i.e., counted) to see if the results were accurate or if there’d been some unusual reason (maybe there’d been a generous tax credit that was responsible rather than someone’s misplacing a decimal or comma).

    • I recall that their demanded recalls (!) ended up showing that he LOST by even more.

      Keep up the good work Melon Felon!

  3. The Big Lie will continue no matter what, if/when Trumpler loses again. And all the scumbag GOPers, both MAGAts and mere Asskissers, will double down on that Lie yet again. We voted him out in 2020 and the Repugnican party refused to accept the legitimate results. It will be just the same shit all over again in ’24.

  4. They will claim whatever they need to in order to steal power! We had to stop nazis in WW2 WITH GUNS! Why? Why couldn’t it have been done with reasonable rational arguments and facts? You tell me. I’m all ears. What will stop them this time if the lazy materialistic half educated citizens fail to intelligently use the vote paid for by the blood of 400,000 BOYS in the last effort to stop these murderous liars???? I’m all phucking ears…to hear the answer.


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