The headline you just read sounds like it comes out of the Hell edition of People Magazine, right? But no, friends, the information which I’m about to share with you comes from non other than Axios, a media outlet of considerable credibility. This story reads like it’s straight from a Bizarro World tabloid and that’s because it’s speaking of both the Trump campaign and then the potential Trump Administration II, which would be the first dictatorship in this country and quite possibly the last. First, the VP position. We want to know who’s one heartbeat away from running the country, and why not the fired Fox News conspiracy theorist?
- Those who’d be considered include J.D. Vance, the “Hillbilly Elegy” author and a MAGA favorite; Arkansas Gov. Sarah Huckabee Sanders; Kari Lake, a leading election denier now running for U.S. Senate in Arizona, and South Dakota Gov. Kristi Noem. (Vance might prefer to remain in the Senate as “Trump’s hammer,” we’re told.)
- Rep. Byron Donalds (R-Fla.), one of the few Black Republicans in Congress, has traveled with Trump on the campaign and would love to be V.P. Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, who lost her House committee assignments because she pushed baseless conspiracy theories, also gets mentioned.
- But here’s an interesting twist: Melania Trump is an advocate for picking Tucker Carlson, the booted Fox News star. She thinks Carlson would make a powerful onstage extension of her husband, a source close to Trump told us. The former first lady has made few campaign appearances this time around — but a Trump-Carlson ticket might encourage her to hit the trail.
Great, let’s listen to Melania. Trump listened to her when she endorsed Dr. Mehmet Oz and we saw how well that turned out for the GOP, flipped that seat blue. So, fine, let’s follow Melania’s lead in this and all things, shall we? There seems to be a good pattern here.
And if Melania is seriously in favor of this, then she’s even stupider than Trump is. At least with somebody like J.D. Vance or Kristi Noem on the ticket there is the veneer of credibility, since one is a senator and the other a governor. The disgraced Fox News emeritus, Carlson as VP, makes the Trump presidency a total comic book run. Or, maybe Melania knows that and she wants to sabotage the second Trump term so that she doesn’t have to fawk with Creesmuss trees and other unappealing tasks.
But if you think that’s strange, imagine Stephen Miller as attorney general. What’s that you say? He doesn’t even have a law degree, let alone a background as a prosecutor or prosecutor cum judge or senator, as so many before him? But again, this is MAGA Comics we’re talking about, so anything goes, right?
Stephen Miller: He could be your next attorney general and, if not that, get a Cabinet-level role to greatly influence immigration policy.
- He was the architect of Trump’s most controversial immigration plans in the first term — including family separation — and has written and spoken extensively about unprecedented plans to detain, purge and punish undocumented immigrants if put back in charge. He’s eager to test the boundaries of what courts and the military can do to make this happen fast.
- Miller currently heads a nonprofit dedicated to suing the Biden administration and promoting “America First” causes, and has been leading efforts to recruit an army of right-wing lawyers to staff a MAGA-dominated executive branch.
- Carlson told Axios that Miller would be his first choice to lead the Justice Department: “He’s a serious person and he understands how the system works.”
Carlson thinks it’s a great idea. So this would absolutely be the Fox News presidency — except would it, since Fox News fired the guy? Not to mention upsetting Trump so yugely as they did.
The rest of this lengthy article is worth the read. It’s a total nightmare vision of government. Kash Patel is touted as heading either the CIA or the National Security Council. And Steve Bannon is headed back to Pennsylvania Avenue in this Brave New World as well. Jeffrey Clark is under indictment, but no matter, he’ll be in “a top Justice Department slot,” I’m sure you’re glad to know. And this next one’s a classic. Are you ready for this?
Ric Grenell — former ambassador to Germany, and Trump’s acting director of national intelligence — would be on the short list for secretary of state.
- Grenell infuriated European diplomats with his “America First” broadsides during his time in Berlin, and has basked in his reputation as an online troll beloved by the MAGA movement for his willingness to go on the attack.
- Career intelligence officials have labeled Grenell — who declassified Obama-era intelligence in an effort to reshape perceptions of the Russia investigation — the least-experienced and most overtly political appointee ever to serve as head of the intelligence community.
What’s that you say? Don’t all these people have to get confirmed? I don’t even want to think about that. But if this nightmare came to fruition, and I don’t see it happening, it might very well take place with a House and Senate in Democratic hands and then none of these bozos would get confirmed.
Unfortunately, that’s a good news/bad news scenario, because then we would see a gridlocked government, Tommy Tuberville on steroids.
And let’s end on this note. This will flip you out if there’s still even one brain cell of yours that isn’t on overload tilt mode right now.
Jared Kushner, who was a huge power center in Trump’s West Wing, has mostly kept his distance from the campaign so far — but might well return to the White House if his father-in-law wins again, with a continued interest in Middle East policy.
- Because Kushner would be talking with Trump’s authority to world leaders anyway, one option would be secretary of state.
Jared as Secretary of State. Ain’t it grand? And the obvious corollary to that is Ivanka as Ambassador to the United Nations. Oh, wait, what the hell, why not just put her in charge of the Treasury? Then she can start printing Daddy’s face on the money and we will be in Hell officially when that action takes place.