What you’re about to read is one of those stories where it’s necessary to read between the lines. Kristi Noem got named to a major post in government, Secretary of Homeland Security. It’s a cabinet position, one of fifteen. One would think that a new job like this would be a thrill to anybody. Evidently not to the puppy executioner. Noem was to have been sworn in today, her first day on the job, by J.D. Vance. But she didn’t show. After 25 minutes of waiting for her, Vance had other engagements and he left. And here’s her B.S. story for not showing.
In a statement to Politico, DHS spokesperson Tricia McLaughlin clarified that Noem was delayed because her late father’s Bible took time to arrive. She apparently has used the book to be sworn into every office she has ever held.
“Secretary Noem has used this sentimental bible to be sworn into every office she has ever held,” McLaughlin told the outlet.
“Secretary Noem was honored to be sworn in by Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas at his home with her dad’s bible. We are grateful to the Vice President and his office.”
The story doesn’t give details, but I’m assuming that when Noem got to the Eisenhower Building and learned that Vance had given up, that she frantically tried to find somebody who could swear her in. And I don’t buy the story about the Bible. If she had a special Bible, is it not logical, Captain, that she would have procured said Bible when she was nominated for the post or certainly after she was named to the post? If that one special Bible has such meaning for her, then she should have made sure it was handy — or grab any old Bible and go to work and get the job done.
But this is typical GOP behavior. Lauren Boebert missed a crucial vote on the debt ceiling but then lied to her constituents that she had boycotted the vote. Alas, we all carry little movie cameras in our pockets these days and somebody caught her on video running up the steps of the Capitol at the last minute.
So we don’t know where Boebert was that day, and we don’t know where Noem was earlier today. But I’m hoping that some kind of a backstory comes out, as it did with Boebert.
You may have heard the expression, “Begin as you intend to proceed.” If this is how Noem intends to proceed running Homeland Security, heaven help us. A lot of Stephen Miller’s and Tom Homan’s excessive cruelties will probably take place without the “boss” of the department doing anything about it. Or, maybe that’s an agreement that’s already been made. I wouldn’t be surprised.
We hope you’re not late to your own funeral, Kristi. Maybe better make arrangements for the special Bible to get there first, just in case.
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that’s rich sworn in at Thomas’s residence 🤣
Isn’t it obvious there was a mix-up? It wasn’t the bible that was missing. Vance thought she was joking about it being his responsibility to provide two puppies for the event. HER plan was to be sworn in, then present Vance with one of two special handguns so each could shoot an energetic puppy in the face – her version of throwing the glass in the fireplace after a toast. When Noem learned there’d be no puppies she bailed. I’d check Thomas’ back yard for a freshly covered over hole.
Anyone who brags about shooting a dog that wasn’t rabid…well…what do you expect? I remember a scene in Yellowstone where RIP was driving and saw a horse down in a field that was alive, but buzzards were landing on it. He went down with his gun, chased the scavengers away, and struggled with the knowledge he had to shoot it to put it out of it’s misery. He said to himself: “I’d rather shoot a thousand men than shoot a horse.” I know how you feel RIP. I’d rather evil people catch a bullet rather than a helpless puppy. Be sure to send your nazis my way to confront me about my meaning bitch. I, being a veteran, from a family of veterans, won’t shed a tear should someone decide your time is up. Oh, and why is that book do important? You don’t know a damn thing about its contents, and you don’t follow a damn thing in it. Next time use Hitler’s manifesto. It would be more in line with you.