I Don’t Believe It! The Supreme Court Finally Gets One right!

Out damned Spot! There is still the smallest spot of blood!   Lady Macbeth   Macbeth

The simple sadistic pleasure of the moment is almost intoxicating. The condemned man has had his last meal, he’s already strapped in the chair, the clock is ticking down, and the damn phone in the office just keeps ringing because the Governor is out on the golf course.

Quite possibly for the first time in his wasted, useless life, somebody finally treated all purpose scumbag Steve Bannon with the kind of cold disdain and disgust he treats everybody else. In a brief, blunt statement, the ‘Supreme Court ordered the aging seditionist to get his fat ass to the federal prison camp in Connecticut by Monday, or they’ll drag him there screaming and kicking.

It’s about time. God knows good old Two Shirts is putting the best possible face on it. When the appellate court to him to get lost and do his time, Bannon was all bluff and bullsh*t, They can do anything they want, they’ll never shut me up! There isn’t a jail that can shut me up, there isn’t a prison that can shut me up! Wanna lay a little coin on that, mofo?

Personally, I love that misnomer phrase “prison camp.” If that’s a camp that Bannon is going to, it’s the kind of camp where they used to send homeless orphans in the summer. You know the one, the camp counsellors couldn’t get jobs at cool camps because they couldn’t pass the criminal background checks. And security at the cool kids camps didn’t have guards armed with shotguns with Dobermans on straining leashes. Welcome home Two Shirts. Think of it as a home away from home. If home is a Siberian gulag.

To my understanding, the main difference between a prison and a prison camp is the accommodations. A prison has blocks full of cells. Prison camps have dormitories. You know what the prison definition of a dormitory is? Imagine your high school gymnasium with about 100 cots, footlockers, and bedside tables in it in neat rows. It’s kind of like bunkering down in an emergency shelter during a hurricane. But with barbed wire fences and armed guards.

If Bannon wants a tutorial on this, maybe he should pop in and pay Jared Kushner’s dear old da a visit. Because with all of his blister and bullsh*t, Bannon is either covering or ignoring one simple fact. For the next four months the feds own his dumpy ass.

You get up when they tell you to get up. You eat what and when they tell you to eat. You wear what they give you to wear. You go where they tell you to go, when they tell you to go, and do what they tell you to do. Bannon is a cranky old man, used to giving orders and getting his own way. Those halcyon days are over for the next four months.

But here’s the sprinkles on top of the sundae. Bannon’s persona is as a loud, abusive bomb throwing reactionary. But according to former Breitbart editor Kurt Bardela, who worked for Andrew Breitbart, and left the company due to Bannon’s abusive behavior, that’s actually a kinder, gentler Bannon. The Bannon he worked for and with is a total pr*ck. When Bannon would throw a foul mouthed temper tantrum over the speakerphone in his office, they could hear him in the bathroom at the end of the hall.

Now I’m 67 years old, but in the interest of journalism and my readers, I’d almost plead guilty to transporting an underage sheep across state lines for illicit purposes under the Mann Act, if they’d just stick me in Bannon’s prison camp for the next four months. It would be worth every minute of it.

Bannon really is an unutterable *sshole. It was reported at the time that one of the reasons Trump sh*tcanned Bannon was because of the nonstop ration of sh*t Bannon kept hitting him with. I could probably own the camp commissary by selling black market Redenbacher’s to the other prisoners as we anjoy the show.

Because here’s the thing you need to remember. There is no parole in the federal system. Under sentencing guidelines, four months means four months. What kind of four months is up to Bannon. And I already know how that’s going to go.

Bannon, by nature is a disciplinary nightmare. He is going to keep charging at authority like a drunken ram repeatedly rushing a plexiglass wall. I’m betting that Two Shirts doesn’t make it two weeks without landing himself in the disciplinary ward. 

Here’s a perfect example of how. Prisoner communications are restricted. Mail going both ways is opened and inspected. A prisoner can only use the phone to contact his lawyer, unless special permission is granted. Bannon has sworn a mighty oath that no prison can shut him up. So watch for the misfit toy to use his lawyer’s office phone as a conduit for a transfer to a conference call at OAN, or NewsMax, or the like. I think we can throw two weeks in solitary in there, especially if it’s not his first offense.

This reminds me of an old story of the day. A local guy in my neighborhood got drafted and sent to Vietnam. But as a conscientious objector he couldn’t kill, it was immoral. So he’d just shoot over the heads of the enemy. When he came home on leave, one of the guys asked him if he’s seen combat. The guy said yeah. The first dude asked him how long he shot over the heads of the enemy, He sadly replied about 10 seconds. We’ll see how tough Bannon is when the rounds start flying over his head.

I thank you for the privilege of your time.

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