I remember one time seeing an extraordinary chocolate sundae. It had layers. It started out with a layer of rocky road ice cream, then there was a chocolate mousse ice cream on top of that, Then actual hot fudge and all this was stacked on a brownie.

The clip you’re about to listen to is like the sundae, except imagine different kinds of shit. If we start out with bullshit and then add a layer of horseshit, and then top it off with chickenshit and slap it down on a meadow muffin, you’ve got the idea.


Alex Jones heroically saved someone’s life. Alright, class, time for a quiz. This will give you the idea.

Start all your replies, “I heard…”

  1. I heard Alex Jones was going to blow his brains out on the courthouse steps but decided not to, thereby saving a life;
  2. I heard Alex Jones took a shot at Herschel Walker. Walker is in critical condition, but his other multiple personalities are just fine and they’ve taken up a collection for Jones;
  3. I heard that Alex Jones grabbed a kid’s lemonade and drank it, claiming that he saw somebody put poison in it and he was trying to save the kid by sacrificing himself;
  4. I heard that Donald Trump, Jr. was going by the courthouse on a pogo stick and Jones opened up a manhole cover so Junior would fall in and be safe from ongoing traffic.

I’ll see your best efforts in the comments below.

I don’t know where Jones found his co-host, or stand in, or whatever TF this guy is, but he is a washout. And the church windows? Last time I saw Infowars, the set looked like the reception room in Hell. Where in the known or unknown universe was this absurdity filmed?


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  1. ISTR that Shroyer is also in trouble for his actions on 1/6. They seem to love telling the government all about their crimes when in front of cameras, but denying them in courtrooms.

  2. Some people ain’t human, some people ain’t kind.
    Open up their hearts & here’s what you’ll find…
    A few frozen pizzas, an ice cube with hair…
    A broken popsicle, you don’t want to go there…
    John Prine

  3. I heard that Alex Jones was seen squeaking through the elevator doors to get off on the first floor of his hotel, while three other people were being given oxygen and being treated for blunt force injuries … he thus saved their lives by not going down one more floor to the lounge … What a generous person, always thinking of others … /S


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