Come and listen to my story ’bout a runt named Scott…Nasty piece of work, really thought his shit was hot…Off he goes one day just to run for President…And crawled back home when all his money was sent…Loser, Dude…Nasty mood   Murfster35   The Wisconsin Hillbylly

News Flash! Florida Governor Ron DeSantis dropped his terror campaign against the Disney company when they announced they were looking for a male lead for their new family comedy movie, Honey, I shrank the Gov! Just kidding. After all, it’s Sunday.

Well, now I guess it’s kinda, sorta, semi official that Florida Governor Ron DeSantis, The Pocket Moppet, is in the race for the GOP presidential nomination. He did two appearances supposedly pimping his new bullshit screed, and gave two speeches. The reviews were mixed. The venues were full, although not stadiums or event venues. He got several standing ovations, especially when he boasted of shipping human chattel from Texas to Martha’s Vineyard, and stayed for about a half hour after each, happy handing.

Mistake #1. DeSantis needs to fix this, and quickly. For a GOP candidate, Iowa is notfly-in state. Iowan’s are spoiled by their long time status of the nation’s first caucus. They want to pampered and catered to. That means showing up at their diners roadhouses, snarfing on omelets and hash browns, or fried chicken. Gladhanding through a crowd is not Iowa’s style of  retail politics. DeSantis should have stayed the weekend.

The more I see of DeSantis trying to get into the groove of national politicking, the more I’m reminded of the short lived, long mocked presidential campaign in 2015 by Wisconsin GOP Governor Scott Scooter Walker. And it isn’t just the physical similarities, both being bantamweights. A comparison of them is like looking at two sides of the same coin.

  • Let’s start with their pre presidential run careers. Both are purely in state actors. Neither of them has any experience or knowledge in setting up a national campaign organization
  • Both of them have benefitted from states with strong in-state GOP control, gerrymandered to the hilt, and have created strong in state fundraising games to take advantage of state GOP dominance
  • What fame both have/had nationally was purely due to in state shenanigans. Walker became famous for his pitched battles with the unions, and for surviving a recall attempt in his second term. DeSantis si reportedly known for his idiotic WOKE campaign, as well as shipping 50 Texas migrants to Martha’s Vineyard to one up Abbott of Texas, who uses buses
  • Both men got out of the gate fast. If memory serves me correctly, Scooter walker was the first to scoot out of the gate and announce his candidacy in 2015. And while DeSantis has yet to formally announce, his intentions have been clear since his reelection in 2022
  • And while both of them jumped in early, neither one of them appears to have done any of the requisite advance ground work to allow them to actually launch a national campaign successfully

This was a fatal error for Walker, and may prove to be one for DeSantis too. Come on, y’all know the drill. Somebody publicly hints that they’re think of running, or forms an exploratory committee. Which is followed by months of mostly silent work. The potential candidate quietly goes from state to state, judging interest and trying to line up deep pocket donors. Both Walker and DeSantis seem to have felt that since they were fundraising powerhouses at home, national deep pocket sugar daddies would fall all over themselves to spread the long green. That ain’t how it works.

But the second error can be just as fatal. The old prosecutorial rule is that The one who rolls over first gets the best deal. That goes for politics too. When these potential candidates are doing those exploratory runs, they’re not just trolling for donors. If they have a half a brain, they’re quietly picking a state campaign chair, who will quietly pick county campaign chairs, who will quietly line up paid staff, as well as volunteers ready to hit the ground when the call comes. The quietly picked state finance chair will start quiet fundraising, ready to rent offices immediately. The longer you wait on this, the more the top quality disappears to other campaigns, and you end up with table scraps.

Worst of all, both of these imbeciles got it into their heads that because they were so successful in their states, they were political savants. The mindset becomes, What works at home works anywhere. What bullshit. For example, Wisconsin is a largely agricultural state. What thrills the rustics and farmers in Wisconsin will bomb in more industrialized states like Pennsylvania and Ohio.

As I wrote previously, in his two speeches in Iowa, DeSantis used the word WOKE more than 400 times. This is a recipe for disaster, with a car crash for dessert. Hell, even I wouldn’t want to hear passionate female moaning 400 times in 25 minutes. It would land me in the cardiac care unit!  And the cherry on top is that according to a USA Today poll, a majority of voters outside of Florida have a totally different definition of the word WOKE then DeSantis and the rest of the GOP does, and it ain’t going to help Pissantis when he takes his shit show on the road to more diverse states.

In Walker’s case, while he was the first to enter the 2016 race, he was also the first to exit it. And in doing so, he did the smartest political thing in his life. He spent his withdrawal speech literally begging the GOP primary field to unite behind one moderate candidate, lest Trump steal the nomination with 35% of the popular vote. Of course, nobody listened to him, and neither did anybody when I said the same thing.

I suppose there’s time for DeSantis to right the ship,  ut I’m doubtful Haley has already declared, and you can bet she did her due diligence on those quiet road trips. And as Pence starts making quiet trips to early states, you can bet he’s done the same thing. And if Mike Pimpeo is actually serious, he’s almost assuredly doing the same thing right now. The pickings are going to be kind of sparse for DeSantis in important early battleground states.

But the biggest reason I doubt DeSantis’ ability to turn it around is his  arrogance and stupidity. DeSantis boasts constantly about his strings of success as Governor, but to a cynical nation, what has he actually accomplished?

  • He led the nation with Covid deaths due to his moronic mask and vaccine resistance
  • He pissed off the largest employer in Florida, and in the process stuck the constituents of two counties with an additional $1.2 billion tax bill
  • He has personally engineered a doctor and nurse shortage due to Covid fatugie, and a teacher shortfall due to it being almost impossible to teach there is you’re not a card carrying member of the KKK
  • Even DeSantis is trying to personally back away from his facorite practise of banning books from schools and libraries, finally having figured out thet this has nothing to do with freedom
  • And he’s about to personally engineer a student enrollment crisis in Florida public universities, since his WOKE agenda basically makes it impossible to get a stable, balanced, accurate education for about $30k a year

Even Florida voters are turning away from his latest legislative stupidity, like imposing a six week abortion ban, and allowing concealed without either a a license or a permit. But this is the hill he’s chose to die on, and I’m betting he does it quickly. Maybe not quite as quickly as Scooter walker, but soon enough.

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  1. He came to California and dissed the state while at Ronny’s memorial library. Not that we’re fond of Ronny, but that’s stupid.



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