Isn’t it reassuring to know that the foreign policy of the United States is being run by the Pushmi Pullyou? You think I jest? How I wish I were. We had J.D. Vance on the Sunday shows, this very day, and he said that there was no interest in a regime change in Iran. J.D went out of his way to not only say that, but to stress that the United States has no beef with the Iranian people per se, but only their nuclear bomb development program. The only problem with that, is when you drop bombs on a country, you don’t drop them on only one governmental policy, bombs destroy property and kill people who may have nothing to do with the policy you claim to be adverse to. J.D. also said that Trump was the only president smart enough to handle this issue with Iran, that all the former guys were “dumber” and here is brilliant Donald Trump to kick in his two cents.

And guess what? Even the Secretary of Defense doesn’t know what’s going on with respect to Iran. But not to worry, Pete’s giving a press conference at the Pentagon tomorrow, that should clarify things.

Let’s extrapolate from George Orwell now: “The party told you to reject the evidence of your own eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.” Add to that, “And the party demanded that you accept whatever Big Brother’s whim of the moment was and to pretend that that had always been his strategy, all along.” Oceania is at war with Eastasia. Oceania has always been at war with Eastasia — and Donald has always been in favor of regime change in Iran. Well, maybe not twelve hours ago, but could somebody please memory hole all these inconvenient tweets? I mean, damn.

And let’s just drop this in now, like it was a bunker bomber: Donald misspelled his own name because auto correct doesn’t work in screaming all-caps mode. Must be a liberal plot, don’t you think?

Here’s the MAGA Civil War brewing, Charlie Kirk going after Lindsey Graham — for voicing the same thing that Trump just did now on social media.

You need to read the top of Charlie Kirk’s tweet. It says: “This is insane. Regime change will result in bloody civil war, killing hundreds of thousands…” and you can see the rest. We CONCUR, Charlie. But our opinion is not your problem. Your problem is that the Cantaloupe Cretin, who is supposedly smarter than all the “dumb” presidents, like Dubya and H.W. before him, is the one bucking for a regime change!

It doesn’t look like it’s a one stop strike operation anymore. It looks like there’s a lot more involved. But if you want to really know what’s going on, ask Vladimir or Benjy, because they’ve got the answers, being the ones pulling the strings.

Not even six months in and WWIII is trending every single day. Great.

 

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6 COMMENTS

    • I couldn’t see any strike zone on that map. I looked three times to make sure I was looking at the right thing. Does that mean Trump didn’t hit anything?

      8

  4. Love the wry “Pete’s giving a press conference at the Pentagon tomorrow, that should clarify things.” in a piece where it is clear nobody has a handle of things (or T, who doesn’t even have a handle on himself that lasts the circuit of a goldfish round its bowl)

    5

  5. How many times have we seen or heard the headline, Cheeto has gone too far? Only to wake the next day to find Cheeto has gone even far-er? The point is, there is no bottom.

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