Even If Biden Hadn’t Withdrawn, Vance Would Still Be Killing Trump

When they show you who they are, believe them   Maya Angelou

In today’s Imbecile Roundup we actually have a twofer. Let’s dive right on in, the water’s fine.

Imbecile #1, Traitor Tot came out in a rally and laid it on the line in a way that puts it all in cement. I mean, there’s no walking this kind of sh*t back later. And then he used a stick and put his initials in it.

In a rally he literally begged his strongest base group, Evangelicals, for support, Look, Christians, please, I need you to come out for me one more time! I promise, just this one last time. And I’ll tell you why. If you vote for me this time, in four years everything will be fixed, everything will be fine. You’ll never have to do it again! Please Christians, I love you, I love Christians, I’m a Christian too and I love you. Just come out this one more time!

Whoa. Where do you even start with something like that? For starters, His Lowness sounds like a 17 year old begging his old man for the car keys so he and his buddies can drive out to the American Adult Film Expo and try to find a way to sneak in. Please Dad, please! I’ll mow the grass tomorrow! I’ll wash the car before I leave, and I promise I’ll wash it after I get back. Hell, I’ll even detail the f*cker! And I promise I’ll never, ever, ever ask to borrow it again! Just one small problem. Since the SCOTUS blew up Roe v Wade, he’s got nothing to sell that they want to buy.

But here’s the second problem. For some strange reason, El Pendejo ex Presidente thinks that for voters, even his base Evangelical voter, who show up for every single election, even primaries when they aren’t actually electing anybody, that exercising their right to vote is somehow or other a weight heavier than indentured servitude. That they’d love nothing more than to vote once, and never be bothered again.

Now that might work for his bloodthirsty Trombie base. Hell, they’d be thrilled to go out in November for his Hitlerite ass, and then never again have to rouse themselves from the sofa, and the Duck Dynasty marathon on the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November every two years. Il Douche is hitting the sweet spot there.

But Evangelicals are different. They like to vote, and en masse, it makes them feel like they’re in control since most other people don’t do it. After all, they spent 50 years being led by the nose by the GOP to the ballot box in the hope of overturning Roe v Wade. Along with mandatory prayer in schools and outlawing homosexuality. They’re well known for bouncing their own candidates that promise one tihing and then do another. Evangelicals have always had an uneasy alliance with the Cheeto Prophet, and if they vote for him, they’re gonna keep a tight leash on his fat ass.

But get used to that clip, because you’re going to be seeing it almost daily in Democratic attack ads. The Trumpster Fire made it crystal clear, if he wins in November, this will be the last free and fair election we ever have. What he’ll do with any Democrats that get elected is uncertain. Probably have them jailed as domestic terrorists. But anybody with two ears has now been forewarned.

And now on to Imbecile #2, Beggar Vance. The current reporting is that Trump’s selection of Vance as his running mate was an arrogant luxury as GOP insiders are now calling it. The Scruffy Guru was well aware of Vance’s extreme views on abortion and families, but Trump felt the election was in the bag, and wanted Vance to run up the score with the rural goobers to provide Trump with a crushing landslide victory.

The dumb sh*t. Trump’s working thesis was that Biden would be on the ballot, and since His Lowness would never back down from a fight, or voluntarily give up power, especially where his personal freedom could be on the line, neither would Biden. Surprise!

But let’s just say that Biden stayed on the ballot. Vance would still be almost as toxic to Traitor Tot with Biden on the ballot as he is right now with Kamala Harris on the ballot instead. I’ll explain.

The Pampers President has finally gotten it through his Neanderthal skull as to just how toxic the issue of abortion is to the GOP in the post Roe era. The Orange Julius has paddle footed away publicly from a nationwide abortion ban, is fuzzy on contraception, and actually favors IVF. Geez, I guess the third time really is a charm. The idiot has finally learned to try to moderate his position on unpopular topics.

Beggar on the other hand supports a nationwide abortion ban, wants IVF banned, supports prosecutors reaching across state lines for confidential medical information on women who flee the state for an abortion where it’s legal, and wants no exceptions for rape or incest, two wrongs don’t make a right. Even worse, with the Mango Messiah taking a busman’s holiday from the campaign trail, Vance is committing the cardinal sin by outshining his boss. Vance’s views are now, by default, becoming Trump’s views. That isn’t what His Lowness signed onto this death cruise for.

In 2024 you have abortion initiatives on the ballots in at least four states, FL, OH, NV, and likely AZ, almost all critical swing states. If Biden were still on the ticket, it would be Harris that he would tap as his top attack dog on the issue. And with Vance’s extreme views, Harris’s effective prosecution on the issue would bring in votes for the Democrats, even if Gumby were on top of the ticket. With Harris atop the ticket, the SS Trumptanic is shipping water every time Vance opens his fat, hillbilly mouth.

And since it’s Saturday, I’m going to give my faithful readers a twofer on Imbecile #2 as well. It is becoming more and more clear that Beggar is planning on running his part of the campaign on a purely racist, fire alarm tone. And no, I’m not talking about that DEI sh*t, that’s just his opening tag line, like Two Corinthians walk into a bar. I’m talking about something more devious that nobody else seems to have caught on to yet.

One of vance’s major lines of assault, which I must admit I had never heard before, so it must be the creation of his fevered hillbilly brain, is this. Somehow or other, women, and couples, who for whatever personal, financial, or physiological reason choose not to, or are unable to have children, somehow or other magically makes them less worthy of participating in democracy with couples who pump out a unit every couple of years.

His lamebrained idea is that people who have children should have greater clout in the electoral process, since they have more skin in the game. Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. I know I’ve heard that one before! Goddamn it, where have I heard that one before?!

Oh, yeah! In American History in high school! Back in the good old, genteel, antebellum days of the south, slave owners were able to cast 2/3 of a vote for every slave they had on their property. And back in the good old days, women weren’t allowed to vote at all, although slave owners could add black women servants to their vote tally.

So, if I’m following Vance’s train of thought correctly, he wants to let every American male with kids cast 2/3 of a vote for each kid for the candidate of his choice. And since the redneck sexist has described a woman’s greatest treasure of a woman’s life being giving birth and raising a family, it wouldn’t surprise me if the sneaky little sh*t didn’t try to figure out a way for the husband to cast her vote too.

JD Vance is an open can of worms that you could catch a killer whale with. And he’s not going to shut up. They’re carefully placing him in rallies with rural dipsh*ts where he gets a warm reception. He’s having the time of his life. My only question is how long Emperor Numbus Nuttus is going to let Vance keep ramming his philosophy down Trump’s throat in the media. He has until August 7th to make a change. Tick-tock.

I thank you for the privilege of your time.

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