Boys. You in a heap of trouble Trooper Mills The Blues Brothers
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, isn’t this special!
Bitch Mitch McConnell, The Grim Reaper, is finally casting his lot on the side of the angels. McConnell made a public statement today that he firmly believes that El Pendejo Presidents is guilty of high crimes and misdemeanors, and he’s just as happy as a piggy in slop that the Democrats in the House are moving forward with impeachment, and he’s fully onboard. Sooo, he’ll be calling the Senate back to Washington tomorrow, to prepare to receive the articles of impeachment on Thursday, right?
Make no mistake about it, this is huge. Few have been harder on McConnell than I have, but I was very impressed with his passionate and heartfelt speech on the floor of the Senate, mere hours before Traitor Tot unleashed his hell hounds on the Capitol. But I’ve been intimately familiar with McConnell much longer than I’ve been scuba diving in Trump’s open cesspool, and this kind of an about face is totally out of character for him. Yes, this is about Trump, but it’s also about something deeper, and I think I know what it is.
Right now, Mitch McConnell is absolutely, blindingly furious, and he’s right to be. In the space of 8 weeks, McConnell went from being the second most powerful Republican in Washington, behind Trump, to a soon-to-be inconsequential player. And mostly he blames Trump. Because Trump cost McConnell his role as Senate Majority Leader, with all of the power that entails, by being such a pig shit around the loss in Georgia, and poisoning the well for the January 5th special elections that cost him his majority. And because the smart money says that Chuck Schumer’s first act as Majority Leader will be to nuke the filibuster for legislation, at that moment McConnell will have no more control of what happens in the Senate than Kevin McCarthy doers in the House. McConnell just got reelected, and Trump just resigned him to 6 years of nothing more than frustrated futility. More than enough reason for McConnell to go to the mattresses to get revenge against Trump.
But McConnell’s outrage is not constrained to Trump alone. There are several other people right now, in the GOP caucus who have engendered his ire, and to my mind, that’s where the real action is going to be in the coming weeks, especially once the impeachment is over with. Mark my words, Mitch McConnell, a man who also doesn’t mind letting a grudge age properly before chilling it and uncorking it, is about to embark on a purge.
One of the things that struck me about McConnell’s statement today regarding Trump’s impeachment was his statement that Trump needed to be purged from politics. This statement is actually totally in character with the Mitch McConnell I know. For all of his faults, McConnell is a lifelong institutionalist, he believes in the rules and the institution of the Senate. No matter how Byzantine, underhanded, and Machiavellian McConnell’s tactics, they always fell within either the rules themselves, or gaps that he was able to wriggle through. And those are about to disappear.
Once the states moved to ratify their election results, two things happened. First, McConnell finally took to the well of the Senate, recognized, and congratulated Joe Biden and Kamala Harris for their victory. That was public. The second thing took place behind the scenes. McConnell sent a letter to his GOP caucus, in which he made it crystal clear that, already knowing that there were a shit load of GOP House members who would move to object to certifying the votes of several contested states, McConnell demanded that no GOP Senators sign on to the objections, killing them in the cradle. Win or lose go down in the Senate like a shot dog. In Georgia, McConnell wanted to save several vulnerable GOP incumbents running in 2022 to avoid a difficult, and possibly fatal floor vote. And just to drive the point home, McConnell had his number two tell the media that if there was an objection to the electoral votes of any state, it would be a Point made, one would think.
But apparently not to Josh Hawley and Ted Cruz. Hawley came out first and confirmed that he would sign off on at least one challenge, closely followed by Cruz. To measure Cruz’s popularity in the GOP, you have only to ask Lindsey Graham. It was only a couple of years ago, when Cruz was being his usual dick self, that Graham quipped to a reporter that If Ted Cruz were murdered on the floor of the Senate, and the trial was held in the Senate, then no one would vote to convict the killer. And the simple fact of the matter is, Josh Hawley is just too goddamn new and irrelevant to be butting heads with Mitch McConnell.
Remember what McConnell said in his statement today, that he wants Trump purged from the body politic. And personally, that is exactly what I think that McConnell has in mind for both Hawley and Cruz. Once the transfer of power is complete, and Chuck Schumer is the new Majority Leader, I would be amazed if McConnell didn’t move to start proceedings to expel both Hawley and Cruz. If my understanding of Senate protocol is correct, just as with impeachment, it takes a 2/3 majority to expel a member. But because this is the Senate, the rules are arcane. The way I read it, of a quorum is present, it would require 2/3 of the Senators voting to remove the Senator from office. Oddly enough, the same is true for the impeachment, which is a reason to watch closely for the next week or so. Because, what it means is, if, say 35 GOP Senators have a Brazilian Bikini Wax appointment that day that they just can’t break, there would be 75 Senators voting. Which means that 50 Senators, likely all Democratic would be all that is needed to remove Cruz and Hawley from office. Which is exactly the same maneuver that could be used in a Trump impeachment before January 20th.
But McConnell’s outrage may not stop there. Apparently the SEC moron, Tommy Tuberville, who was sworn in only two days earlier, decided that butting heads with the alpha dog of the Senate, Mitch McConnell was the top thing on his list to do. Throw in Marsha Blackburn, and a handful of others, and you have a lovely little insurrection on your hands. And McConnell is the one who knows exactly how to deal with an insurrection.
Being a sitting US Senator is boring, tedious work. You have to sit there and listen to people that aren’t you talking endlessly. The only thing worth being a Senator, especially where campaign kaboodle is concerned, is your committee assignments. The more prominent the committee, the richer the lobbyists who will regularly visit your office with envelopes stuffed with campaign cash. And the more cogent your committee assignment to your state, the more pork you can go home and brag about shoveling into the larder.
And guess who controls all of the committee assignments for a party in the minority? Who else? The Senate Minority Leader, in this case, Mitch McConnell. And if any of those ill begotten GOP Senators who voted in favor of stripping state electoral delegate counts don’t find real religion real quick, and go to confession in McConnell’s office ASAP, they run the risk of becoming every bit as irrelevant as McConnell himself is about to become. This is just getting started. Don’t touch that dial!
Follow me on Twitter at @RealMurfster35