It must be embarrassing to be Mike Pence. I mean, after all, the man is 64 years old, and he’s still waiting for his left nut to drop. Quick history sniglet. Pence was dead in the water in his reelection campaign for Governor of Indiana when Traitor Tot threw him a lifeline and named him Vise President. Without Trump’s largesse, Pence’s political career would have already been over.

Fortunately Mike Pence has the principles and morals of a jellyfish, and the balls of one of those eunuchs that used to swing ostrich feathers up and down over the Emperor’s head. He spent four years fanning and fluffing Trump, and even when Trump did a Queen-of-the-Hearts and called out Off with his head! Pence just keeps sniveling along. Now you know why Karen Pence’s shoes are so clean. She has a 6′ doormat.

Pence, like the corn fed Indiana idiot VP that preceded him, and whom he called in his despair, Dan Quayle, has dreams of being the President. And so he quietly keeps trying to maintain fealty with Traitor Tot, while quietly separating himself from Trump’s more unpopular positions, in hopes of converting some of the Trump faithful to his Milquetoast ass in 2024. News Flash! Mookie Mike. As long as Trump is breathing, you have no shot!

Pence recently got subpoenaed by Special Counsel Jack Smith to show up for his grand jury for a little kiss-and-tell session. And of course limp wrist Mike immediately challenged the subpoena in court. But he did it under the stupidest reason I’ve ever heard.

Pence maintained that because he was acting in his ceremonial role as Senate President, he was protected from answering any questions concerning January 6th under the Speech and Debate clause of the United States constitution. This is a real thing, and it protects Congressmen and Senators from liability for things they say from the floor while debating constitutional business. This is why congress critters can’t be sued for libel, slander, or defamation for things they say on the floor of the chamber.

It took a federal judge only about a heartbeat-and-a-half to point out the fact that as Vice President Pence was a member of the executive branch, his title was purely ceremonial, and Pence was not a sitting member of either the House or the Senate. He told Pence to put his Big Boy pants on and go talk to the nice man in the room full of people. Trump piled on by filing a lawsuit claiming executive privilege, and that judge told him to blow it out of his ass.

And so of course, fearing nothing more than The Wrath Of Don, Lickenby Mike filed an appeal. And as you would expect, his media response to the ruling itself was pure, vanilla Mike, I followed the constitution on January 6th, and because I truly believe in the constitution, I’m appealing in order to keep following the constitution. Bullshit to-English translation, The mean dude in the black muu-muu blew me off, so I’m going to try a different dude.

Look, I never worked for the Psychic Friends Network hotline, although I do have a touch of The Shine. And I can already tell you how this is going to go. The judiciary is sick and tired of Trump’s delay tactics. This is Tuesday. On Thursday watch for the appellate court to give Pence’s lawyers until midnight to file their formal appeal, forwarded to the DOJ, and giving Jack Smith until 6 am to file his response. And then We’ll see you in court at 1 pm to get this squared away before dinnertime.

Trump and his faithful toadies don’t seem to realize it yet. You can only file so many totally specious bullshit arguments before the court before they get totally fed up, and 64 are way too many. And now they’re treating pretty much anything Trump on a severely expedited basis. My guess? Pence will be talking to the grand jury next week. After all, Evan Corcoran is a real lawyer, and even he didn’t bother appealing to the Supreme Court. He knows there was cold comfort there. Hey, Mike! As Joe Louis used to say, Nowhere to run, and nowhere to hide. Enjoy the ride.

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8 COMMENTS

  1. Pence is worried that his testimony will be needed at trial and that the trial will be held before the election. He’s wrong. The documents case (which doesn’t involve Pence) may be indicted and tried before the election, but the Jan6 trial (which does involve Pence) has so many moving parts that the chance this case gets tried before 2025 is slim to none.

    He’s really trying hard to dispel the idea that he was somehow heroic on Jan6 for simply doing his job.

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  2. Apparently they want to know what went on outside the electoral college stuff. The days before and after. So his ceremonial job wouldn’t even come into it…unless he said something that involved it.

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  3. I’m still perplexed. What part of a scaffold, surrounded by a chant of ‘hang Mike Pence!!!’, does he not understand? Put Qtip back in the box.

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    • Pence brings new dimensions to the word deluded. My God, he is almost as dumb as a Republican. Oh, he is one. When he dies, I hope he is buried. Everyone needs a place to piss.

  4. This dumbass thought that he would be going in front of a typical incompetent hoser “judge” who he used to get away with constantly lying too while he was a hoser state cop.
    Instead he gets to talk to Smith who is looking forward to seeing him lie like a “christian” so he can CRUCIFY him….
    Fucking lying punk traitor…..

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