Stephen Miller, the even meaner MAGA consultant, admits that he’s off the market now that he’s married and has children. Girls, you’ve missed your shot. But the man born to hate does wistfully remember those halcyon days years ago when he was a vigorous younger man taking his prowess on the road, looking an awful lot like a particularly skinny Skeletor. He knows deep in the heart that he doesn’t possess, that his association with Trump powered that big motor. Women couldn’t stay off him. Or so he says.
Miller gave some advice on Jessie Watters show yesterday (Video down below) and you will never believe what he sees as key to his success. Yes, it is the association with Trump because it necessarily includes “alpha male” bona fides. This is critical, says Miller. But first to his statement and only then will we fearlessly mock the hell out of him: (Video below and here)
“I’m married now, I have children, but I wasn’t married that long ago. I was single and I was on the market. If you’re a young man – it’s very important in an election season – who’s looking to impress ladies, to be the alpha, to be attractive, the best thing you can do is to wear your Trump support on your sleeve. Show that you are a real man. Show that you are not a beta, right? Be a proud and loud Trump supporter and your dating life will be fantastic.”
Right. Okay – let’s drop some reality on little Stephen. First, if a guy is single, being a “young man” doesn’t matter in the slightest going well into one’s 40s, 50s, and presumably beyond that – I wouldn’t know. All of us definitely want women in our arms. Additionally, campaigns necessarily involve a lot of travel and a lot of hotels. You are Hoover Dam right a ton of sex goes on – because it does, that’s why. There is something about traveling and hotels that eviscerate the normal “rules of life.” Things that are not supposed to happen do and can get out of hand. Or so I’m told. Conventions are a thing for a reason.
So Stephen really isn’t starting off with some great insight as to his attractiveness. No. But most certainly, if you happen to be traveling in the Trump campaign it’s probably a good idea to wear that allegiance on your sleeve. You betcha. But if you are in a hotel bar that happens to be hosting a bridal party of radiology residents who are young women, I guarantee you want to roll that sleeve up, Stephen.
And what’s with this alpha male ship? Near as I can tell – in MAGA world, an alpha male is one that is licensed to be an asshole. By their definition, an alpha male always seems to center on aggression and one wants to be damned careful when thinking that aggression leads to sexual or romantic attractiveness to a woman – that’s not a joke, be damned careful. It also always seems like they mock guys who can actually speak to those women radiologists and engage in meaningful conversations, as if tanned muscular aggressiveness is all she could possibly want. Try both, muscles while reading.
But then again, no one ever labeled me as a “sexual matador” – but then again, I wouldn’t tell anyone if a woman ever has!! Part of being a “man” – beta or otherwise, is being comfortable in your own skin, confident such that you need not to explain yourself and definitely not your exploits. A simple “I’ve been fortunate enough to know many wonderful women…” is more than enough… And I have, btw.
Talking about it on national television screams insecure beta male. So, Stephen? Just wave away the topic with, “I’m a grateful husband and dad. How I got here no longer matters at all.” How confidant does that sound! Women surely think: “That’s so cool. He’s thinking about his wife and blowing off the invitation to brag. Great guy.” And please, just go with me on this , Stephen – a ton of women would have just that response.
Stephen may be referencing raw power, not any physical stuff. Miller was in close proximity to Trump. That proximity is currency in a campaign. Women and men will trade it both ways to increase their own proximity to the top person. Stephen may never have been more than a body in the way of a goal. Perhaps women wanted to be on Stephen’s arm right up to the introduction and then be handed off. It is certainly possible.
What seems impossible is that Stephen was known as a “matador” – and if this truly sounds like high school to you, you’re probably a well-developed adult – because with Stephen it was likely all centered around him being an asshole… I mean “alpha”… no a “MAGA”… hmmm, some might say that they’re redundant.
I don’t know if I’m alpha or beta. I do know that I”ll be fine. Oh, and Stephan? Try making women laugh so hard they can barely eat and see if you’re ever lonely.
God Bless: I can be reached by women who are cultured and love to read at [email protected] and @JasonMiciak, oh, and here’s Voldermot
Watters: We are getting a lot of texts from women about Stephen Miller. Our audience believes you are some sort of sexual matador.
Miller: Some advice to any young man out there. If you are a young man who's looking to impress the ladies, to be attractive.. the best thing you… pic.twitter.com/PMwMO3Voz1
— Acyn (@Acyn) October 9, 2024
All I can say is eewww! I almost spit my coffee on my keyboard!
Please tell me it was because you were laughing so hard.
jason
It made me about spit out my coffee and then bang my head on my desk because you are SO spot on with this!!!! 😉
Does Miller know what a REAL matador does? Why on earth would he think that any woman would be impressed with his responding to Watters’ description of him as a “sexual matador?”
Matadors, incidentally, are just ONE cog in the whole bullfighting spectacle. The term literally translates to “killer” (from the Spanish, “matar”) but they’re generally assisted by the picadors (“picadores” in Spanish) who wield little lances (“picas”) that they use to test the bull’s strengths and weaknesses; a skilled matador will be paying attention to the bull’s reactions to the picas. There’s also the banderilleros (“flag-wielders”) who run alongside the bull to plant the banderillas in the bull’s shoulders (they’re little spikes, usually bearing a color associated with the matador, and their purpose is to try to weaken the bull).
But it’s also worth noting that *real* matadors risk death every time they enter the arena. Numerous matadors have been killed–frequently from being gored but also from being trampled.
But, I find it HILARIOUS that a man who looks like Stephen Miller would be offering any hints on attracting women. (Personally, I think Miller’s wife–if she was actually conscious when they got married, rather than being drunk out of her mind–had to have lost a bet with some girlfriends. Or she was so desperate to get married that she was willing to overlook Miller’s resemblance to a walking penis. I really can’t imagine she had any genuine enthusiasm at the marriage “proposal”–it was probably more of a 30-page legal contract, stipulating how many times they would engage in sexual activity per year and once she bore him enough little demons, she wouldn’t have to lie back and think of something more pleasant, like a root canal or facing an IRS audit.)
Not enough whisky in the world.
Putin doppelganger
The word is “predator,” not matador. Surely women, even MAGA women, are not throwing themselves at Golem’s feet. Ew!
Exactly. As a single-dad to a teen girl, I wanted dto be real clear that one has to be so damned careful thinking that aggression will get the girl. Confidence is great. Aggression, no.
Of all the things that never happened, this never happened the most.
I mean, well… Just look at him.
He’s a long way down the Greek alphabet from Alpha isn’t he?