I don’t get it. I mean, there’s a lotta sh*t that I don’t get, but I especially don’t get this sh*t. Has coward wrestling coach Gym Bag Jordan has neither shame nor self respect? When I had the occasional off game, when nothing worked, I kicked myself for days for letting my teammates and the fans down. Every time Jordan walks into the House Judiciary committee meeting room, he walks in already knowing he’s going to spend the next 3-5 hours humiliating himself and being humiliated by others. He spends the time looking like Muhammad Ali’s body bag.

This time was worse than usual for Hey! He groped me, Coach! because this time he got humiliated by name, and by a Democrat no less. Some GOPtard had just told Merrick Garland he should be held in contempt of congress, and then ended his time. Jordan said The Chair recognizes the member from California, got up, and started heading for a side door. He must have known what was coming. Democrat Eric Swalwell opened with, The irony here is pretty rich today. The member wants you held in contempt of congress, while our own Chairman, walking out of the room right now, is currently on something like Day 500 of ignoring his own legally issued subpoena to appear in front on congress. He was an eyewitness to the worst crime in US history, yet he refuses to share his story.

The Democrats were like a bunch of kids who just got a shiny new X-Box One under the Christmas tree. This was because Garland brought his A-Game, and had his closer in the bullpen if needed. In his opening statement set the terms immediately, Let me make this clear. I am not the President’s lawyer, nor for that matter am I congress’s prosecutor. Nobody tells us whom to prosecute, we follow the facts wherever they lead.

One of the reasons Jordan always looks so bad is that his whole caucus ends up looking like sh*t. This hearing has been on their calendars for weeks, and it’s not like they’re doing any legislating or anything. And yet, when they get their five minutes, they come off like a bunch of pledges who wrote their term paper this morning, after an all night bong party at the frat house. They ramble, run their words together, lose their places, and the questions are so childish they couldn’t cut it on Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?

A few quick examples of rampant stupidity;

  • One MAGA moron slyly tried to slander Garland as being anti catholic, based on an anonymous and discredited DOJ memo calling Catholic activists domestic terrorists. Garland showed the most emotion he did all day in replying, For anybody who knows my personal and family history to infer that it would be possible for me to feel animus to any other race or religion is a disgraceful statement. BANG!
  • Many of them knew who they wanted to blame for the Hunter Biden debacle, mainly Garland, they just couldn’t agree on how. Some members wanted to blame Garland for a lack of supervision that allowed Special Counsel Weiss to slow walk the investigation and allowing Weiss to cut a sweetheart deal with Biden that fell apart. Others wanted to lambaste Garland for not replacing the clearly incompetent Weiss once he was sworn in
  • Both sucked. When asked why he didn’t replace Weiss after being sworn in Garland replied, In several of my private meetings with GOP Senators for my confirmation, they expressed concern at my replacing Weiss. I gave my word that I would leave him in place, and give him complete freedom to conduct his investigation. And then he was grilled on why he let Weiss slow walk the investigation and cut a sweetheart deal with Biden, Garland replied, I gave my word to the GOP Senators that Weiss would be free to run his investigation as he saw fit, with my full support and resources. Get it? He gave your side what they wanted, and now you’re pissed. Stand up and take a bow, FOOLS!
  • Gym bag himself stepped on a landmine when he tried to roast Garland for slow walking the Biden investigation through the critical period. They have tax charges on Biden, but not for the critical period. It was the 2014-2015 tax forms where Hunter Biden made millions sitting on the Burisma board, which goes straight to the White House, but NO!, they let the statute of limitations run out so it couldn’t be charged anymore! Garland’s reply was a cold dead fish to Jordan’s chops, Congressman, those events took place during the Trump administration, when either Bill Barr or a temporary AG was in ultimate control of the investigation. BOOM! Look, DON’T stand up, that was too stupid to deserve a bow

This happened over and over again. MAGAt’s kept trying to hammer Garland, only to be reminded that the events took place during the Trump administration was in control. The surprise was that everybody expected the GOP to lambaste Garland on the Trump indictments, But even Gym Bag wasn’t stupid enough to touch that particular hot stove.

Meanwhile, the Democrats were acting like this was an old time vaudeville routine. Time after time they used Garland as their straight man Abbot, so they could play Costello to ram home the zinger.T he best one was when a Democratic member extolled Garland for his long and distinguished 27 year federal court career, including 12 years heading the DC Circuit Court of Appeals. And then he let it rip, Attorney General Garland, in your 27 year judicial career, how many times were you invited to take a trip on a billionaire’s private luxury jet? And, that would be none. And how many times did you take your wife on a vacation to an exclusive private resort, luxury private jet included, at the expense of the same billionaire? Again, that would be none. And did you ever allow any billionaire to pay the tuition at an exclusive boarding school for any of your children? I’m really not comfortable answering hypotheticals, but district and appellate court judges are covered by ethics rules, and I always held myself to the highest level of compliance.

I didn’t have the stomach to torn on FUX News to watch them roast Jordan over an open fire on a spit. But today’s hearing made one thing crystal clear. Jordan’s Hunter Biden crusade is dead in the water. Whenever the GOP hammered at Hunter Biden today, it wasn’t based on his criminal conduct, because there isn’t any, it was engineered towards finding a scapegoat for his Waterloo. And he found him, one David Weiss. The GOP was more pissed off today at Weiss’s incompetence than they were at Biden’s alleged criminality. And here’s a helpful hint. How long has it been since the last House Subcommittee Investigation into the Weaponization of the US Government? Don’t look for anymore anytime soon. Jordan is finally getting tired of the dead horse flogging him. 

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9 COMMENTS

  1. Weiss’ “incompetence” is that until recently he didn’t allow political pressure from GOPers to affect his work. Trump’s DOJ WANTED him to come up with something, ANYTHING he could prosecute Hunter Biden for. Hell, even Barr got in on the act of trying to dig up something. The problem was while some of Hunter’s business stuff might have not looked so good (then again he never expected his dad would wind up running for President) when viewed objectively but Hunter was a well-trained and good lawyer. He knew how to stay within the legal lines. So, try as they did the Trump DOJ and Weiss couldn’t find any “there” there.

    I can only imagine the pressure that was brought to bear on him (and Durham too) to come up with criminal cases to file that would make Joe Biden look bad, if only by association. Durham came up with some very, VERY weak shiite and lost bigly in court. Hell, one of his top assistants resigned in protest over his pushing for weak prosecutions just to make Barr and ultimately Trump happy. I’ll bet Weiss took a look at how Durham’s career was ruined and hoped, even prayed that with the change in administration he’d be allowed to wind his investigation down. But Garland as you note made it clear to GOPers in Congress that Weiss would be asked to stay on and also be given free reign to decide whether charges should be brought against Hunter Biden, AND that Weiss would be granted any resource he asked for!

    In the end the best Weiss could come up with was tax evasion and a charge about lying on a 4473 about being a current drug user while purchasing a handgun. These things damned near never make it to court. Hunter Biden promptly paid his back taxes and a hefty penalty which for anyone else would have been the end of the matter. As for the gun charge, having once worked in a place that sold guns I took that paperwork seriously but some of the questions ARE pretty ridiculous and the specific one in question has been ruled un-Constitutional by an appellate court. When people ARE charges on that particular matter it’s usually an additional count of a broader set of charges, such as someone charges with other felonies. Not the case here.

    But Weiss bowed to GOPer political pressure and like Durham went ahead with weak shiite. Now he’s gone and made things worse, but actually getting Hunter Biden convicted of something isn’t really the point for the GOP. It’s having something to hammer President Biden with next year. The LAST thing they want is Weiss bringing some other charge that’s marginal at best and worse, having Hunter Biden demand his right to a speedy trial while his lawyer suggest to the judge they’d be open to a plea deal. Which the judge would no doubt pointedly ask Weiss “why hasn’t this already been settled with a plea deal? I suggest after we adjourn you sit down with Mr. Biden’s lawyer and work something out. I’ll expect to hear back from the both of you say next week!”

    This is one giant mess. But you’re spot-on in noting Weiss had all kinds of time while TRUMP was still President to bring those tax charges and anything else that Weiss will try to pretzel into a new criminal prosecution. His career is toast. As it should be. If Gym “He GROPED me Coach!” Jordan wants to grill someone with his committee it should be Weiss. Who was appointed by Trump and supervised by Barr. And who has been given every bit of authority and resource as well as independence he’s asked for from Garland.

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  2. someone should definitely suggest looking at ANOTHER prominent political son who is visibly wasted practically every time he opens his mouth in public, and loves to hunt caged endangered animals….
    funny how no one cares about Hunter Biden’s Second Amendment rights.

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    • Yeah. It is funny that, during all the cries about his having a gun while dealing with intoxicating substances, the NRA never once spoke out about Hunter Biden’s Second Amendment rights. After all, the Supreme Court itself ruled that the “well-regulated militia” clause is invalid and there is NOTHING at all in the Second Amendment connecting any state of sobriety or inebriation with one’s right to keep and bear arms.

      Oh, wait. The NRA doesn’t care about Democrats or those folks related to Democrats. Its sole concern is the unlimited proliferation of firearms of all varieties to anyone who (apparently) came out of a uterus. (And it wouldn’t surprise me if the NRA’s next goal is to ensure that fetuses have a right to keep and bear arms–IN THE UTERUS with no input from the mother.)

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  3. Peter Navarro must be standing in front of a mirror somewhere asking: how did I get hammered when this pissant Jordan committed the same crime and has walked? Curious people want to know. Merrick, I think you should take a long hard look at ol gymbag!

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    • Nope…He Was on The Beat with Ari Melber today, and he’s STILL defending his delusion that Trump had invoked executive privilege for him…The biggest news he made was in saying that His Lowness had contributed some $300,000 to his legal defense…

  4. I’m constantly gobsmacked at how the GOP Hunter Biden obsession is reported on daily, when there’s no there there…and Jared Kushner is sitting on over two billion dollars of largesse from Prince Bone Saw.

    What, does the majority of American media have ADHD? “Look at the shiny keys!”

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    • I can live with it simply because the non FUX News coverage portrays them for exactly what they are, a bunch of feckless morons…

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  5. I know if I were Merrick Garland, I would’ve come loaded for bear with stacks of paperwork related to any and all allegations of criminal behavior or being accessories or abettors to criminal activity for every single GOPer on the Committee when they attempted to present some idea that the office of the Attorney General should be held in contempt of Congress for not doing what Congress wanted. (And maybe also have some juicy tidbits about other GOPers not on the Committee.)
    Somehow, the idea of Jim Jordan being confronted with questions about whether it’s proper for a man who is alleged to have ignored claims of sexual abuse by college athletes to even be in Congress, especially on a committee that’s supposed to be investigating some sort of alleged criminal action, would make for some REALLY juicy political theater. And wouldn’t it be nice to get the sexual abuse claims against Matt Gaetz into the Congressional Record so that it’s always tied to his name? And maybe the notion that *maybe* MTG was wearing a hoodie on the streets of DC the night before the insurrection also becoming part of Congressional testimony would help knock out these losers and their nothing-burger “investigations” (which have less credibility than the average entrant in the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest).

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  6. Swalwell’s burn of “Jacket-off” Jim is worth watching toe video of.
    As he began to speak, he put up a couple of iPads which displayed in large bold fonts a count-up clock showing how long (to the second) old kiddie-fiddler cover man has been ignoring HIS subpoena.

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