Donald Trump has precepts to give you, friends, if you are contemplating parenthood and planning to grow a kid or two. I must say that the nomenclature is a little bizarre. I thought that people grew plants or crops and raised animals or children. Evidently not in Trump world. There you grow people. Maybe the Trumps are planted matter of some sort and Trump grew them in an environment like Little Shop Of Horrors. Actually, when you get down to it, this is starting to make some sense. Can’t you see Junior intoning, “Feed me, I’m hungry,” and then Ivana throws one of the neighbors’ kids at him and he eats the kid like a Venus fly trap.
Trump: “I always would say to my kids: 'No drugs, no alcohol, no cigarettes.'…I think it worked, but who knows? You never know!"
pic.twitter.com/EmPKKWXWqj— Republicans against Trump (@RpsAgainstTrump) November 16, 2025
Trump is not at his most articulate today. He said, “When they see whiskey coming down the plank….” Where do Republicans dine these days, on pirate ships? But all in all this is Trump at his best these days, which is rambling, inarticulate, boring as all hell.
What’s that you say? Why didn’t Trump’s precepts work on Don Junior? That would be good to know indeed. I suppose Sigmund Freud would tell you that Junior rebelled, figuring if Daddy was saying don’t do it, it must be the very thing to do.
I also find it a bit hard to believe that Trump the teetotaler was doing all the things at Epstein’s place that credible evidence is showing that he did. That seems a bit hard to believe, that he would be in an environment of the worst debauchery and yet be stone cold sober.
As a matter of fact, if he was stone cold sober in that environment and raping children, to my mind that makes these alleged transgressions even worse. At least if Trump was under the influence then while you can’t excuse his actions you can at least understand the loss of inhibition on a chemical level.
But of course Trump is pretending all that never happened and he’s Mr. Clean Living. Righto.
