So, just FYI, to the extent any of this matters, some of us have had no regrets when it comes to spending time with America’s liberal women. Indeed, well… Leave aside the relative physical merits of anyone of any gender, because – as we all know, things only begin with physical attraction. If Natalie Portman pulled out a MAGA hat, some of us would be pulling out of the driveway. There is a reason America’s liberal men love our Alyssa Milanos and other Zoom women…
Trouble is coming around the corner if we don’t corner this column a bit and get to defending you, liberal women. Not that you need a man to defend you, but we’ll take up arms anyway. Kid Rock is after you, and if I didn’t care for peace as much as I do, I would just let all of you have at him. But first, let’s set out why he hates your gorgeous… Ahem.
According to Mediaite’s reporting, the little Rock was being interviewed by – who else? Fox News’s Jesse Watters, who began asking a question regarding something that couldn’t possibly matter less when Watters really got the whole “inappropriate” thing off with “hairy armpits.”
During an interview on Thursday with the 54-year-old musician – who was briefly married to Pamela Anderson in the 2000s – Fox News host Jesse Watters played a clip of a group of liberal protesters and asked, “When you play your concerts, do you ever see anybody with blue hair, armpit hair– female armpit hair? Some of these people we’re looking at, Kid, I don’t know.
Ummm. All one has to do is watch television to know that body hair is on the out generally (And, who really cares? If that’s an issue, let the people involved worry about it, not Jesse Watters), and nowhere is body hair on the out more than in the liberal bastion that calls itself “Hollywood.” Additionally, having seen many interviews of people in line at MAGA rallies, no one on Fox News should be shit-talking body hair. If I see one more unkempt beard under Ray-Bans… (Actually, hasn’t the whole “every guy” – except me – has to have a beard – thing now run its course? Of course, it has.) Where were we?
Ah, yes, regardless, the whole hairy armpit reference lit Kid up like a crack rock:
“Listen, I was just watching your clips, and you know, we have this low birth rate in America, and it all made sense,” replied Kid Rock. “It just hit me right now because who’s gonna sleep with these ugly ass, broke, crazy, deranged, TDS liberal women?”
Okay, wait. Some men, and I’m speaking on behalf of a friend, have personally seen to it that America’s birthrate has no relationship with anything to do with anything about liberal women. Birthrates would be far more threatened if liberal women did have a physical issue. Some of us know there’s no problem. Any birth problem (High or Low) is more about planning, or not planning, as the case may be and… damn. This is hard because there is a chance one comes off looking like a pig – or a prude, in affirming that liberal women are, well, as attractive as they want to be? Don’t shoot the messenger! And we will stay away from commenting on what MAGA contributes to the American obesity problem… I take that back. That is just mean…
Nope.
You come after our women and… They will take care of you and there’s fck all some of us can do about it even if we wanted to. By the way, Rock wasn’t done:
“I mean, you look at these rallies, it’s like a bunch of women that no guy wants to sleep with and a bunch of dudes that want to sleep with each other.”
Why does Rock care about “dudes who want to sleep with dudes”? And, again – many of us are quite certain that very few liberal women are lonely during their days away at, wait – what? Liberal rallies? Where are those! Ursula, I need to take a business trip! I need to attend a business convention!
Is it possible that Rock gave the entire game away in a faux pas for the ages? It sure sounds like he’s referencing a “bunch of women” at rallies and noting “no guy” wants to sleep with them. Ask anyone else what comes to mind when they first hear the word “rally.” Perhaps we should get out of here before we get in more trouble about who wants to sleep with who, and do it before noting just how good Taylor Swift would look with blue hair.
Jesus, please help. Oh, and, Jesse? Take this and slide it up your…Hairy armpit!
Alyssa Milano ❤️❤️
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God Bless: I can be reached at [email protected] and also on X at @JasonMiciak, and please follow me now on Bluesky.
Zoomers, we are always in need of donations. It’s been an especially rough month, and my own health has not been great these past few weeks, which just adds to the frustration. Anything you can spare will be immensely appreciated. And thank you to all who have donated generously already. Ursula
Well I’m pretty sure most women won’t sleep with a 54 year old has – been.
Who’s gonna sleep with a 54 yr old ugly assed, deranged, broke ass loser who is bald under his long haired wig, who couldn’t hit a 24 pack of bud light with a semi automatic
I’m shocked that a rich guy like him doesn’t own a mirror. If he were 15 years old, his look might pass. At his age, he’s just another clown in a funny hat.