Today is not a good day to be Rudolph the red-nosed former lawyer, former mayor, and it looks like, former human being — at least if we are to believe Giuliani’s latest gripe, that the court sketch artist made him “look like [his] dog.” Umm…Rudy? Maybe you just haven’t taken a good look in the mirror lately. That’s actually a good likeness. Anybody seeing that sketch in newspapers here and abroad knows that it’s you, not your canine, but you.
Let’s get current on the woes of America’s pain in the ass mayor. the New York Times is reporting “A federal judge on Monday held Rudolph W. Giuliani in contempt of court for failing to cooperate in the handover of $11 million of his personal assets to Georgia poll workers he falsely accused of helping to steal the 2020 presidential election.”
Mr. Giuliani, the former mayor of New York City, has so far failed to turn over the bulk of his personal assets as a down payment on the $148 million judgment the poll workers, Ruby Freeman and her daughter, Shaye Moss, won in a defamation lawsuit.
The judge has yet to detail what specific sanctions Mr. Giuliani faces. But being held in contempt could possibly hinder the former mayor’s attempts to hang onto his Palm Beach, Fla., condo.
The assets include a 10-room apartment on the Upper East Side of Manhattan; a 1980 Mercedes-Benz convertible; a collection of 26 designer watches; and rare Yankees collectibles, the most valuable of which might be a signed and framed Joe DiMaggio jersey.
Rudy doesn’t want to part with the money. He wants to be like Donald Trump and get away with murder and so far that’s not happening for him. Trump hasn’t even paid Rudy legal fees owed, last we knew. (Remember when Rudy was billing out his Strike Force at $20K daily? It might as well have been $20MM, Donald had no intention of paying.)
Donald did, however, throw a fundraiser for Rudy in Bedminster at $100,000 per couple and, how to put this…..it wasn’t standing room only with people lined up for miles, let’s just say that much. If you didn’t know better, you would think that the wealthy Republicans of New York, New Jersey and environs didn’t give a phuque if Rudy lost everything. They were not ponying up. Not for him. For Donald, yes, they could get important favors there. And if you think the big money types are cruel, look at this. Just look at this.
Rudy is so fucked, this is hilarious.
— Big Mike J (@bigmikemikemel) January 6, 2025
As stated, you could show this sketch to anybody anywhere in the world with a working knowledge of American politics and that person would know this is Rudy Giuliani.
He’s got to come up with the watches and the Mercedes-Benz convertible. Satan is down in Hell savoring every moment of this. This is so perfect. Giuliani sold his soul to Donald Trump and by dint of how these things go, possession of a soul may be Trump’s for a short time here on earth, until he kicks you to the curb without paying you, but the Devil holds the deed on said soul for all eternity.
Giuliani has known Trump for many decades. He, of all people, should have known how this would end. But he didn’t. And he doesn’t now. He’s trying to salvage his worldly goods and they’re not his to salvage anymore. He should have been thinking about that when he ruined the lives of two innocent women and made them social pariahs.
But no, Rudy was drunk on vainglory and whatever else he imbibes great quantities of these days, and he thought he could Do A Trump. Sorry, Rudy. Only Trump can Do A Trump. Why, we don’t know. We do know the main reason is that the Republican party and the Supreme Court will enable him, no matter what he does. That’s about 99% of it.
But Donald’s saga hasn’t been written yet in full. He was impeached twice during his first term. Who knows what he will pull now or what’s in store for him? All we do know is Rudy. Is. Toast. Burnt toast, in fact.
Impeached? Last time I heard it was a witchhunt. Let’s see what’s said by the major outlets a year from now. Rudy Rudy Rudy…how is it you former prosecutors seem to forget how the law works? What did master tell you as you were capturing flies to eat in your cell? That he would rescue you? Did you count on the white rich boys, who set up and maintain the system, just because a couple of black ladies got roughed up a bit in the master’s plan? You know, because you helped with burying the bodies, that master would suck you dry and cast you out into the harsh light of day. Rudy Rudy Rudy. You did suck 9/11 dry…I’ll give you that. I guess it took a while for the towers to fall on you.