The first video here is a must-see although all of these are classic. As a matter of fact, I think the odds of Lincoln Project making one of their min-epics out of tonight’s debate footage is very high. The governor of Florida debated the governor of California this evening and when you watch this you’ll wonder if the two men are even the same species, let alone doing the same job. The one on the left, the Floridian, came up from Atlantis, methinks, the place where he sank after his flying saucer got messed up going through the Bermuda triangle. I am telling you, DeSantis took weird to a new level tonight.

DeSantis has taken coaching from different people. We know that. There was a piece on Twitter last year depicting Matt Gaetz coaching DeSantis on how to deliver a speech. And then of course Casey DeSantis, being a former television anchor, has been said to be instructing her husband on how to be charming on camera. What you’re about to see is, in my opinion, the struggle of Ron’s id with his ego, with his tutoring. He attempts to arrange his features in some kind of a “charming” manner, but ends up looking like a character in a low budget sci-fi movie. Either he’s a space alien trying to pass for one of us, or he’s just plain nuts. Occam’s Razor will work in either case.

That’s bad enough, right? But it CONTINUED! Yes. Take a look. And DeSantis has still got that asinine, kewpie doll, unplugged grin. WTF does he think he’s doing?

This bottom clip is great. Ron breaks out in his big phony grin when Newsom says, “You’re down 41 points in your own home state.” Where is his cone head and when is he going to claim to be from France?

This is it, friends. This is what Casey has cued him to do.

If you were thinking, “it can’t get worse,” wrong.

You know what I’m waiting for? For Ron’s skull to crack open and his suit to fall off and some polka dotted purple bald thing with giant eyes and fish scales pops out and pulls out a ray gun. Hand to God, if I saw that, it would not surprise me a bit. I would be relieved in fact. Wow, I would say, I knew this all along, with my spidey sense, that DeSantis was from some other world, how nice to see it confirmed.

Now here’s a moment: a “feces map” of San Francisco — later on to be applauded by Kayleigh McEnany.

The feces map is being hailed as a “strong and powerful moment.” That’s wonderful. What’s DeSantis going to do next, take a $hit on stage? I mean, how clear and powerful would that be, right?

Well, friends, I can tell you that back in good ole Los Angele eeze, there was a famous map, called the Map to The Stars. Now we have the Map To The $hit, in San Francisco. Oh, my.

 

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11 COMMENTS

  1. I’d be willing to bet everyone there told DeSantis he was great, nailed it, cleaned newsom’s clock. and he’d accept that as truth because like Trump he has a sincerely held belief that he is the smartest, most clever man in any room. tomorrow he’ll be touting his big win and carrying on as if nothing has changed and he’s now proven that he’s the best candidate for the job, especially since Trump hasn’t got the cojones to debate anyone.

    18

  2. He’s still in the uncanny valley.

    Almost, but not quite human, just different enough to notice that it looks odd, weird even.

    Not quite human. Not a person.

    Something that isn’t one, like the ‘alien presidential candidate’ from Mad magazine.

    17

    • Ya know, I’m struck dumb at how much Destructis resembles Mad’s Alfred E. Newman in these posted videos (POTRZEBIE forever!)

      3

  3. Angry little Ron can’t even get his own shite together, let alone – in his puffed-up eyes – dump on his debating opponent, with any semblance of truthful logic. And that tone dead, tortured, whining voice of his, it literally could curdle fresh milk. Erk!

    13

  4. That map? I hope someone with computer skills I don’t possess makes a meme of the U.S. without all the states (except for FL) lines marked in. Instead the U.S. will be a flesh colored hue and the only lines will be to draw in it being a butt/legs sitting on a toilet (the north border of FL drawn as the rim of the toilet) and FL colored in to be a turd dropping into the bowl!

    5

  5. Funny how ron-boy doesn’t hold up a map showing fecal smears left by the terrorists who attacked congress on J-6th. BTW, how can he tell the difference between the fecal smears?

    The man just isn’t bright. I’m not sure what he was before he became a ‘pube pol: I’ve heard he used to have more than 1/2 a brain in his head. Perhaps a person loses a significant portion of their grey matter when they put that (r) beside their name.

    Here’s one thing tho’ I need to comment on: the smile thing everyone rides him about. For some folks smiling is as natural as breathing. For others, and I am in this camp, smiling does not come naturally and when we are forced to smile it is an awkward process for us and painful for others to have to look at. I don’t know, it just seems silly to ridicule him on that when he does so much that can be ridiculed, derided, etc.

    5

    • I agree about forcing a smile. It’s the reason that many of us, me included, take bad pictures.

      In DeSantis’ case, it’s also when and about which of his opponent’s remarks he decides to deploy that smile thing. I’m never sure about what his expression is supposed to convey. Disagreement? Disgust? Amusement? Gas?

      6

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