Trump’s Legal Team Tries Getting Cute. Like ME Sitting In At The World Series Of Poker

It’s funny how it keeps coming around to bite you in the ass. In a very funny but very real way it was Trump’s Florida legal team that forced The Supreme Court’s hand, And now Trump’s legal carp are trying to prove they’re worth what they’re shaking Trump down for. And f*cking it up.

They’re not the only ones. Last night on MSNBC Joy Ann Reid went so far off the hinge I thought I was watching FUX News. She did her screaming mental patient number over Merrick Garland, then followed up with a conspiracy straight out of Q-Anon Insisting that the court only took the case to sit on it until October. One small problem, Joy. All they had to do was to take the case yesterday, and put it on the fall session, beginning in September. Hearing arguments on April 22 means a decision before the last week of June.

Bur Reid is right, personal interests are being served here. I continue to believe that the court was originally going to pass on the case, then just vote to affirm the lower court ruling stand. But then Trump’s Florida fools pushed the envelope by filing a motion to throw out the Florida charges due to, what else, absolute immunity. Which would likely be back in front of them within weeks of the general election. Better to get it off their hands now.

The judges have their angles too. Alito and Thomas want His Lowness back in the White House so they can retire Traitor Tot naming equally stupid and craven replacements. Gorsuch and Kavanaugh want to get this Trump stigma off their backs once and for all. And Roberts wants to use the summer break to fumigate the Trump stink out of the chambers before the fall session.

As I wrote yesterday, by taking April arguments, the Supreme Court caught trump’s misfit legal toys by the old short-and-curlies.  Trump’s dC lawyers wanted the SCOTUS stay, waste 3-4 months demanding a full DC Circuit review, and only then ask the Supreme Court to hear the case, which would have to go on the fall docket. But the mental midgets in Florida dumped all over the mental midgets in DC by forcing the Supreme court to roll everything into one giant sh*t sandwich and take the obligatory bite. So April it is.

Which means that the Florida cretins are now trying to think on their feet, which is hard to do when you’re clomping around on cloven hooves. There was a status hearing in front of Trump’s kindergarten judge, Aileen Cannon. And lo and behold, Trump’s lawyers tried to get cute. While they argued that any criminal trials against trump this year would be unfair, the defense was willing to take-one-for-the-team, and go to trial on august 12th. And then count on conning Judge Cannon into delaying the trial in motions down the road. I can almost see Trump’s lawyers slapping backs and giving each other noogies as they went down the courtroom steps.

How many ways can almost aberrant stupidity be repaid? At least three I can think of. First of all, Judge Cannon could cut Trump off at the knees, and start the trial on August 12th. Not what Trump wants, but at least they get a tame jury, and a judge in the pocket that hands them every ruling. Besides, Cannon has learned that she overstepped the first time, and is at least trying to learn a little guile.

Second, you already have to know that Jack Smith is keeping an idiot file on Judge Cannon and her universally imbecilic rulings, giving her plenty or rope to hang herself. At some point she’ll make a ruling, and Smith will drop the hammer, not only asking that the ruling be overturned, but asking that Cannon be recused from the case due to her inexperience in a complicated case, as well as her at least well perceived impression of bias for Trump, due to her earlier rulings. What does Smith have to lose, if the judge is already tanking the case?

But the third one is my favorite one, because of the poetic justice aspects. District judges normally have extremely wide latitude in running their court schedule. The Supreme Court already knows three things. They know Trump is stalling to try to run out the clock, they know his DC trial was originally scheduled for March 4th, and they know that they personally stuck their fingers in Smith’s souffle by taking this case. The question now is how they keep it from going flat?

I have always thought that the DCOTUS would actually choose to affirm the appellate court ruling. But if they did take the case, I never doubted two things. They will find quickly and decisively in favor of the government, and they will order that the DC trial take place before the general election. The Supreme Court cannot afford to be seen as aiding and abetting Trump’s getaway scheme until the election. So they’ll deal with Trump’s bullsh*t immunity claims, and then turn him over to Smith’s dogs of war.

Now there’s one more at least feasible option available, due to the events of the last 36 hours. If Cannon schedules the documents case for August 12th, when the court rules against Trump, it will order that the Florida case begin no later than August 12th. It doesn’t matter to the court which federal case goes first, but you can bet that both SCOTUS and the 11th Circuit Appellate court will have Cannon’s chamber phone on speed dial for possible emergencies.

There you have it. With Trump’s dime store shysters in mind, law schools may want to start a 1st year class on The Law of Unintended Consequences. Because Trump’s lawyers spend more time tripping over that than their own shoelaces.

I thank you for the privilege of your time.