By now you all know that one of my favorite tag lines is, I love it when they eat their young! But when dealing with Trump and his legal koi pond, I’ve been forced to adjust it, Keep eating your tail pal, you’ll be in your colon before you know it.
I can’t take this anymore. Really, I can’t. I mean, it’s one thing for Trump to be a legal imbecile, hell, he’s already an imbecile about everything else, why not the law? But when you consider what he’s paying to these low rent ambulance chasers, in advance, he has a right to expect a little more.
Here’s the 411, people. Trump’s shyster wannabe’s filed a motion before DC Judge Tanya Chutkan to throw out the charges against Trump since, as President he had absolute immunity. Every court that has heard this argument has treated it like the dead muskrat on top of Trump’s head. Once Judge Chutkan caught her breath and wiped the tears of mirth from her eyes, she basically told his legal tic-tac-toe team to get real next time.
Fine. Trump’s legal tackling dummies never expected her to give them the time of day. That’s all part of their rope-a-dope delay strategy. Of course they immediately notified the court that they would appeal, a process that carries a time limit with it. And there’s a good reason for their urgency, especially to roadblock the process.
Because for Trump, the sh*t just got real. There’s nothing that tends to get a criminal defendants attention like seeing the mailer in the newspaper from the DC district court, polling several hundred DC residents to come in in the second week of January to fill out lengthy questionnaires with an eye of starting voir dire, or jury selection. Nothing like knowing that the three month timer to your trial date is ticking to focus your attention.
Trump’s problem is that the minute his legal team files their appeal, Jack Smith’s team will argue for an expedited hearing and adjudication due to the tight time limit to the start of trial date.
Time for a backup plan. And Trump’s legal team came up with a plan to do the Billy Bob Snotley Law school and Bait Shop proud. They went back to court with a new motion that came straight out of an old 3 stooges episode.
The motion they filed before Judge Chutkan today stated that upon the date of filing for appeal, Judge Chutkan must immediately cease and desist any legal actions in the case until the appeals are decided, up to and including the Supreme Court. This means that Judge Chutkan would not be able to hold any evidentiary hearings, issue any rulings on issues already before her, hold any status update hearings, hear any pre-trial motions, or begin the jury selection process. Most importantly to their minds, the discovery process must immediately cease until such time as the final resolution is rendered.
What a mouthful! And what a waste, for several reasons. First of all, Judge Chutkan is going to immediately tell them to give their orders to the drive up window at Trump’s favorite KFC, and not a sitting US district court judge. Which the Trump legal team will immediately file an appeal for a stay on her ruling pending a hearing. And that isn’t the answer Trump needs.
Because Chutkan has two things on her side, the law, and her position. As judge, she controls the flow of her case, and Chutkan has been very aggressive. An initial stay on her ruling would only delay things anywhere from 72 hours to two weeks, until a hearing is held to determine whether to extend the stay or not. And 72 hours to two weeks does Traitor Tot no real good at all.
The same thing goes for the hearings. To the best of my knowledge, Judge Chutkan has no status hearings scheduled between now and the start of trial. And Chutkan has been very aggressive in insisting that pre-trial motions be filed as they are created, and not all at once in the final pre-trial motion hearing. Therefore, she has already heard several motions, and her cutoff date isn’t until the last week of January. So a couple of weeks one way or the other makes no difference.
But here’s the McGuffin, and it’s a doozy. As I’ve explained just above, any stoppage of hearings won’t help, because Chutkan already outthought Trump’s legal slugs. And simple legal common sense says that there’s no legal reason to stop normal court trial functions, especially if the appeal is under expedited ruling status. That isn’t going to help Trump.
The Trump legal ant hill is putting all of their eggs into the immediate cease of the discovery process, until such time as the final appeal has been ruled on. Now this is something the Trump team can make hay on. After all, just look at the Mar-A-Lago documents case. The defense spent months arguing before the Kiddie Kourt judge that the insane amount of discovery would take them over a year to go through, forcing a massive delay. They tried the same thing with Judge Chutkan, who told them to hire part time help.
But here’s the beauty of this whole clusterf*ck. Being a professional, Special Counsel Jack Smith cut the Trump legal team off at the knees months ago! At the first hearing with Judge Chutkan, Smith’s legal team announced that they were going to begin the discovery process, and start turning over everything eligible for discovery and that the defense team would have it within two weeks.
The texture of this stupidity is so rich that you could weave a Gobelin tapestry from it. If they get the stay, any stay, the Trump team will go back before Judge Chutkan later and demand that the start of the trial be delayed for several months die to the backlog in the discovery process. The only problem there is that they’ve already. had. all. of. this. sh*t. for. more. than. six. months! It’s not the prosecution or judge’s fault if the defense is dragging its feet on going through that blivet. Mainly because it crucifies their client.
As much fun as I have writing about this nonsense, I’ll be so glad when it’s over. I’ve never spent a day in law school, but I have done a lot of legal reading, and I can’t help but feel that even my unlettered ass could give Trump better counsel. Except that he couldn’t afford me. Person ally, I wouldn’t work for that son of a bitch for every penny he has.
I thank you for the privilege of your time.