Tracking the Election for House Speaker Mk2 – Round 2

Sorry this is late. I was waiting for round 3 but I should’ve known Gym Shorts would take his bat and one remaining ball and slouch off the stage to spread gloom and grumpiness away from mics and cameras. Back in January, McCarthy was averaging three rounds a day. But Gymbo is so mired in the pit of delusion that he’s finding reality hard to take. Round 2 did not go to Jimmy Gym’s plan.

With every Democrat aligning with their leader, Hakeem Jeffries was again the highest vote-getter. Since January’s marathon election, he’s topped the tally in 13 out of 17 ballot rounds for House Speaker. It’s a tribute to Democratic solidarity that their steadfast alliance is so effectively stomping all over Republicans’ futile attempts to resemble a governing party. They look more like the scattered litter left behind in the stadium after the fans have gone.

That isn’t to say there wasn’t progress in round 2 – it just wasn’t in the GOP’s favour. Gym Sock managed to gain three voters but he lost four others so his overall total dropped by one. It gets better. As Forbes reported,

Jordan’s spokesperson Russell Dye told reporters after the vote on Wednesday that Jordan is “going to keep going,” even though he is nearly two dozen Republican votes short

Uh-huh. However…

It’s unclear if Jordan will fare better in future rounds of voting: Some unnamed Jordan opponents told CNN they planned to stagger their votes against Jordan so he loses by a larger margin in future rounds.

Now there’s something to look forward to! But it’s not what we’re used to from the former lock-step party so what’s going on? Well, Gym Shoe’s persuasion tactics might be the problem…

Rep. Steve Womack (R-Ark.), who also voted for Scalise in both rounds, told Semafor his staff has been “cussed out” on phone calls with Jordan, describing Jordan’s strategy as “attack, attack—attack the members who don’t agree with you,” while Nebraska Rep. Don Bacon—a supporter of recently-ousted House Speaker Kevin McCarthy (R-Calif.)—told Politico his wife received anonymous texts and emails urging her husband to choose Jordan.

Sounds like the sort of mob tactics that Prisoner P01135809 learned from Daddy Fred and passed on to his most gullible devotee. Gymbo is the archetypal follower. His self-worth is entirely dependent on how devoted he is to his leader. Unfortunately, people like him always choose the wrong person to follow.

Hence his use of attack strategies. Any halfway reasonable person knows it’s stupid to the point of disastrous to go this route, but not the cultist. They’re going to follow their leader even though he’s an idiot without a shred of savant.

Now for the fun part – who did not vote for Gym Strap.

The rebels are getting more adventurous in their choices of alternative leaders. Two members nominated people who are no longer in Congress. Clearly, they’ve come to the conclusion that no one in the current crop of chaos merchants is worthy of the position. This is true.

One of these nominees is Candice Miller who left Congress in 2017 and is now the Public Works Commissioner of Macomb County in Michigan.

The other is John Boehner, former Speaker of the House.

John Boehner🤣😂🤣💀
I can’t get enough House Republicans humiliating Jim Jordan content.🍿#HouseSpeakerVote https://t.co/5YoCS6Ku1b

— Hadley Sheley (@HadleySheley) October 18, 2023

In this single nomination, Rep Mike Kelly struck back at Jordan’s attack strategies by recalling what John Boehner so famously said about the vandal from Ohio.

Well done, Mike Kelly!

Bruce Westerman from Arkansas made his debut in the race. No one knows why Pete Stauber chose him. Perhaps they’re besties though the opposite was the reasoning given by Ken Buck when interviewed on CNN about his vote for Republican Whip Tom Emmer.

Dana Bash: I guess my first question is: do you really want Tom Emmer to be Speaker of the House?

Ken Buck: No, I don’t. I don’t like Tom Emmer. I think this would be the worst job in America. Mike Rowe would not want to do this for his tv show. This is a terrible job.

Dana Bash: Okay, so just to underscore that – you voted for somebody because you don’t like them.

Ken Buck: I voted for somebody because I wasn’t going to vote for Jim Jordan.

Dana Bash: Yeah. But, but you don’t… it’s not because you want him to become speaker. Okay, so, that says a lot about where we are right now.

Yes, it does indeed say a lot about where the chaos conference is right now.

In the first round, John James chose fellow Oklahoman Tom Cole but he was gonged out (and is represented by a gong in today’s feature image) in favour of Kay Granger. She holds the distinction of being the only House member to accompany a group of GOP senators who used taxpayer funds to spend the Fourth of July in Moscow in 2018. Remember that? Yeah, we at PolitiZoom do too. Not sure what message John James of Oklahoma was sending with that particular choice.

Making a reappearance in the speaker sh*tshow since his debut back in January is Floridian Byron Donalds. He hit his peak in the 4th round with 20 votes. But he peaked too early and disappeared from the ballot in round 12. He’s unlikely to do any better this time.

While Beavis Gym is keen for a 3rd round, the clown caucus is in crisis paralysis. The Washington Post summed it up in this headline: House speaker live updates: Jim Jordan to seek 3rd vote, but path forward uncertain.

So the House is stuck with a temporary speaker but that’s a problem because it can’t function in the pro tempore mode according to current rules. Democrats are quietly suggesting a change in those rules but know the move must come from the right if it is to have any chance of succeeding.

Stepping up to the plate once more is Mike Kelly who introduced a resolution that would temporarily expand McHenry’s powers as Speaker Pro Tempore until November 17, 2023 or until a new Speaker is elected, whichever is earlier. He’s now waiting for it to gather enough support to put it to the vote.

But The Washington Post reporter Aaron Blake observed,

It looked like the way forward early Thursday when Gym Shoelace told a meeting of the GOP conference that he would back a plan to temporarily expand the powers of the interim speaker and delay a third ballot for speaker. But by the time he met up with media minutes later, he’d already changed his mind about the order in which the two actions would take place.

Jordan later suggested to reporters that the plan won’t move forward right now. He said he would seek a third ballot for speaker, with a vote delayed until Friday morning at the earliest.

It’s all part of the GOP MO: disinform, deny, deflect, distract and delay.

We round out this update with Gym Sock’s second-round figures compared to Kevi’s.

Stay tuned, Zoomers, for the next exciting update following the third round of voting – whenever that’s going to be. Gymbo isn’t configured for making quick decisions or even sticking to decisions he made 3 minutes ago. But we’ll be there for round 3 when it happens.

Pictured in the featured image:
Left: Hakeem Jeffries
Centre from top: Jim Jordan, Steve Scalise, Kevin McCarthy
Right 1st row: Tom Massie, Tom Emmer, Lee Zeldin
Right 2nd row: John Boehner, Bruce Westerman, Byron Donalds
Right 3rd row: Candice Miller, Kay Granger
Right 4th row: Gongs (formerly Tom Cole and Tom Massie)