The GOP’s Christmas “Gift That Keeps On Giving”

I think I mentioned once or twice that Teri and I don’t really celebrate Christmas as a holiday. My kids are all grown, and live in other states, nobody ever needs anything when you ask them what they want, shipping the shit requires taking out a 2nd mortgage, and they want to return half of what you got. So we all agreed to just drop the whole thing. When we get our income tax refund, we pick a couple gift we both settle on.

That being said, it doesn’t mean that I don’t recognize a big, fat Christmas present sitting on my dining room table. And this one came in shiny paper and a big silver bow. It came courtesy of the moron GOP voters of Long Island, and Kreepy Kevin McCarthy. And when I opened it, it was everything I had asked for. A nice big, soft, comical political squeaky toy to start chewing on in the new year.

Yeah, you guessed it. George Santos. This clown is the last the thing that the GOP House needed, and every gift that the House and national Democrats could have asked for. He is literally the gift that keeps on giving, at least well into the first year of GOP House rule. And because he’s the Clown Prince of American politics, he’s already ensured that he continues to garner national media coverage.

Have you actually listened to this mental midget? Because if you do, you quickly realize that this shitheels is the perfect Mini-Me for Traitor Tot. Santos literally is Trump, just without the dead muskrat on his head, and with Allan Sherman glasses. Both of them are pathological liars, and both of them are arrogant enough to believe that they can get away with any lie, because their audience is so goddamn stupid. But that’s where the similarities end.

When His Lowness is called out on an obvious and provable lie, his immediate knee jerk response is to double down on the lie, and call the reporter a Partisan hack engaged on a witch hunt! But when Santos gets called out in an obvious and provable lie, his immediate knee jerk reaction is to make up some lame bullshit excuse. And when he gets called out on the lame bullshit excuse, he trots out more lame bullshit, tripping himself up in his own lies. Personally, I prefer Santos. Going up against FrankenTrump is like banging your head against a wall. Santos keeps giving you new and fresh ammo to plink him with.

Which creates a serious problem for the RNC and the GOP House caucus. What do you do with a pathological serial liar who never knows when to STFU!, and just keeps digging the hole deeper for himself? I mean other than to put him in the White House in 2016 of course. Santos is now a national story, and with his big mouth, he’s going to keep right on being a national story. And not the one a major political organization wants their nose being rubbed in every day.

And Santos has the potential to become a major headache for the GOP, and not just for his lying. After all, lying to voters is not a crime, if they’re too stupid to catch on, then shame on you. But the simple fact is that it’s starting to appear as though Santos may have crossed over criminal lines with his bullshit. And that’s a whole other kettle of fish.

Both New York Attorney General Letitia James, as well as the local county DA have announced investigations into Santos. And not for his campaign trail lying. They’re doing what every proficient, qualified prosecutor does, they’re following the money. And Santos’s financial paper trail is like a plate of spaghetti Bolognese dropped from a 20th story window.

In his campaign rhetoric Santos likes to liken himself to a Hispanic Bill Gates, or better yet, Donald Trump. He started small and built this uber successful investment consulting firm. There’s just one problem. There’s no paper trail to back it up. Santos never actually worked for any of the companies he said he did, and his companies were private concerns that filed no paperwork. Santos has claimed that his net worth is anywhere between $2.5 million and
$121 million, depending on which bullshit you’re listening to. But he can produce no supporting evidence.

Instead, in a campaign financial filing statement, Santos said that he had made $55,000 the year before. But on another filing, he claimed that he had personally lent his campaign $700,000 to run for office. But as former federal prosecutor Glenn Kirschner pointed out today, at $55,000 a year, Santos would have to save every penny of his salary for 13 years in order to loan his campaign $700,000. Where did that money come from?

This is the nightmare scenario for the RNC and the GOP House. This is going to go on for months, and Santos has already made himself such a media darling that he has already ensured it will remain national news all the way through. He’s like the Mango Messiah, but without the presidential immunity.

The standard solution for this would be for the Speaker to grab the miscreant by the scruff of the neck, tell him to get into his office and keep his damn mouth shut until somebody tells him to slither out. But that doesn’t work in the MAGA GOP. There is no shame to be found there, and no penitence. Just look at misfit toys like Laborious MTG, Sugar Daddy Matt Gaetz, Goose Stepper Gosar and wingnut Lauren Boebert. All were publicly shamed, and all of them took their disgrace on national road trips to stuff their campaign coffers at the expense of like minded mental midgets. And if you don’t think that Santos is going to do the same thing, you’re sorely mistaken.

And so My Little Chickadees, Happy New Year! But if you’re going into it already sick and tired of George Santos, then I hate to tell you that B-b-b-aby you ain’t seen n-n-nothin; yet. because this pathetic saga is going to go on for months yet, minimum. And Santos himself will make sure that it remains in the national headlines. Because secretly you like all of the attention, don’t you George. Huh, don’t you?