I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken
Come on gang, let’s hop into the Way back Machine for a spin. We’re going all the way back in history to 2008 and 2009. Now, please buckle in, and return the flight attendant to her original upright position make sure your seat back is in the full upright position.
In November of 2008, in a stunning rebuke to the GOP, the country elected its first Kenyan, Muslim, Marxist President. And it wasn’t even close, it was a solid spanking. And on inauguration night of 2009, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, in a closed door dinner announced a platform of complete obstruction in the Senate for the next 4 years.
But while Yertl the Turtle was busy being a crybaby beyotch, there were more serious thinkers in the bowels that were coming to a conclusion. And what they concluded was that they were pretty much fucked as a party. After all, if a dedicated, former POW war hero couldn’t beat a Kenyan Muslim, there was a problem. And the problem was that their base was getting older and whiter, and the Democrats base was younger, more diverse, and ascendant. And so they hatched a nefarious plot.
In 2009, while the Democrats were busy trying to save the world economy, get us out of the ditch Bush Lite had driven us into, and passing affordable healthcare for millions, the GOP was running a nefarious operation under the radar. The midterms were only 2 years away, and these midterms were in 2010, a census year. The RNC quietly pumped millions of dollars in cash and logistical support into state races, in order to take over state legislatures in time to control the 2011 map redistricting. The plan was simple, if they were going to be a minority party, then rig the system to rule in the minority. And it worked beyond their wildest dreams.
Back in the way back Machine and fast forward to 2021. The GOP is back at it again. They rode the Trump wave in 2016, hoping for 8 years of Trump in which to retool and modernize the party, especially in the last 4 years, when Trump wasn’t a threat to run again. But it turned out that rather than the GOP controlling Trump, Trump ended up hijacking the GOP, and was so toxic that he got blown out in 2020. So much for the best laid plans. But meanwhile, their base is still getting older and smaller.
So another killer subversive plan is called for, and the GOP found one. Thanks to Trump, the party is mired for the near future in a platform of conspiracy theories and white grievance racist politics. What else? Use Lemons to make lemonade. The GOP’s new plan is to use these racist tropes to lure gullible constituents into using blathering nonsense like critical race theory to run for school board and local city and county seats, building a bench for higher offices later. It’s diabolical in its simplicity, since nobody pays the slightest attention to these races, so a large MAGA turnout makes election damn near a certainty.
But here’s where the Big Mouth part comes in. Veteran Trump whisperer and all around bad boy, Steve Two Shirts Bannon wants to turn this into his poster child legacy. And as such, his dumb ass has been blathering out over his podcast about how MAGA morons need to start tuning for local offices to keep the faith. Which of course means that the national media immediately picked up on it, which means that the gig is now officially up.
For months now, the national media has been showing us video of local school board and county meetings with a handful of MAGA morons spewing filth about CRT, and demanding goddamn book burnings in retribution. But now that local residents have learned on TV what’s going on, you’re starting to see meetings with a handful of foaming at the mouth MAGA morons, followed by 30-40 actual concerned parents wanting their kids to get a quality education. And being a MAGA moron only works when you’re the loudest voice in the room. And now they’re being drowned out by volume.
Once again, good old Two Shirts has pissed in the punchbowl. Not only has he alerted suburban parents, many of them white suburban women voters of his little plot, but now everybody knows who the MAGA morons are, and will be well ready to vote against them in the next election. They never learn. When you just can’t resist explaining to everybody how you’re the smartest one in the room, you only end up showing how stupid you are. Here endeth the lesson.
Follow me on Twitter at @RealMurfster35
Reason 5928 why none of the Trump goons EVER scared me. If their hubris doesn’t do them in, their stupidity will.
Oh ye gods Mr Murphy, I hope you’re right. The MAGAmorons still have time to lower their volume, stop being so public with their intentions and still burrow their way into all those local boards and committees. Not all of them are as stupid as Bannon. That makes them dangerous.