I was going to ignore this little story I read much earlier today but it’s headlined in my news feed tonight so what the hell.
The Shanks.
Sounds like some nasty disease doesn’t it? Sorta like Shingles (which IS nasty AND painful. My case was a doozy and when a vaccine became available I got set up to get it as soon as I could) or a case of “the crabs” which given Trump’s history and all those one night stands is more than a little plausible.
Trump however is “bigly” into golf. Likes to make a big deal about what a great golfer he is and having such a low handicap. Yet its been ages since he posted a score into the system. (Yes, there’s an official system for obtaining an official handicap that is used in matches/tournaments or even in friendly betting.) Also, Trump is known to cheat at golf. Big time. And he lies like he breathes so who the hell knows what he’s shot in any given round? For all that, much as I hate to admit it except for a couple of years when I got to being able to shoot low 80s for eighteen holes then messed it up by changing my swing Trump could have probably beaten me in a fair match a lot of the time.
The point is Trump loves his golf. Takes it seriously. Hell, enough to lie about how good he is even! And if you don’t know anything about playing golf there are two conditions that all golfers dread developing. The “Yips” (putting and chipping from just off the green) and the “Shanks”, fuller shots where instead of the blade of the club strikes the ball the shaft of the club (for shots hit off tees) or where the shaft/hosel joins with the blade of the club – meaning there’s no predicting where the ball will go. Well, maybe it’s predictable where it WON’T go which is where you intended the shot to go!
Well, Trump shanked a short shot. A fairly routine maybe 30 yard shot but unfortunately for him someone behind him was close enough and with a vantage point to be able to film him. And then post it to Twitter!
⛳️ 🇺🇸 Donald Trump was seen playing golf earlier this week at Trump National Golf Club in L.A.
🗣️ “Trump’s shooting right now, let’s see if he can hit the green…. Oh he shanked it.” ☠️
(🎥 – @rsp3k22) pic.twitter.com/gwcX1UBp2q
— NUCLR GOLF (@NUCLRGOLF) July 13, 2023
Like the Yips, the Shanks can appear out of nowhere. And if it gets in a golfer’s head even a tiny bit it can grow like a poison ivy rash that spread because you scratched at it while the oil was still on the skin and spread it! Like I said, golfers fear this type of thing happening because of how easily it dominates their thinking. For some, quite a few in fact once developed the Shanks (and Yips) never really go away. If one is lucky the reaction is to by instinct laugh and make fun of one’s self. Who here thinks Trump would react that way. He’ll brood on it. Better still, when he learns it started trending on social media and in the news he’ll brood even more. Maybe start demanding it be pulled from social media. Or claiming it’s fake.
Here’s the funny part. The more he thinks and talks about it, the more likely the Shanks will take up permanent residence in his head. Dare we hope that someone will comment about the possibility of him also developing the Yips? Imagine Trump out on the course Shanking shots all over the place, and Yipping puts by “topping” them so they only move a few inches (or even whiffing/missing the ball), yanking/pushing the ball way off the intended line or smacking it too hard, maybe all the way off the green.
Wouldn’t it be funny as hell to have golf get inside Trump’s head so badly he can’t play without completely humiliating himself? It’s been known to happen to golfers. I can’t think of anyone else I’d rather see it happen to!
Well, I’m being snarky and petty with all this but given how Trump has been to so many in his miserable life I won’t lose a moment’s sleep over taking a shot at him on this. Oh, and since the tweet is from a distance, here’s a scene from Tin Cup that shows you what a case of the Shanks actually looks like:
That is an exquisitely targeted curse. I hope it works. No-one would be more deserving of it.
The less we see Trump allowing footage of him actually hitting golf shots, the more the possible it seems he’s already developed a case of the Shanks. Looking again at that tweeted video they are a long ways off. And it seems not playing the same hole behind Trump. I can understand his Secret Service detail wanting to keep a big separation between him and other groups, and in fact if you’re following another group on a par 4 or 5 you’re going to be a couple hundred yards (or more) back anyway. This looks to have been taken from well above and probably from an adjacent hole by a group that had word Trump was out on the course. It makes sense they’d want to get a look at him whether friendly to him or not. (Since they were laughing at him and posted the video I think it’s safe to say they are NOT Trump fans!) Those who cover him should see if when he plays they start clearing the course of others entirely – to prevent just this kind of embarrassing moment.
Wish I could drink coffee… only 9:30 am central… but my brain starting substituting “skanks” for shanks… well for His Lowness and Vileness & his whole regime of evil incompetent mofos (okay to be fair competent in grifting, lying and being all around jerk offs) skanks might be an improvement. With apologies to normal skanks (just in case)
One would think, after he literally spent one whole year, out of four years as Putin’s puppet in the white house, playing golf, and enriching himself by playing at courses he owned, he’d be better than just another fat hacker chewing up turf. I wonder if his Depends were filled after that shot? He probably drove the cart onto the green, dropped the ball into the cup, and gave himself a ‘perfect’ birdie.