Trump Calls Rudy Giuliani the ‘Eliot Ness Of His Generation’ That and All the Tea In China Won’t Save His License

People always say “It’s never too late” in life to do things, and usually that’s meant as an upbeat, positive statement on how to better one’s circumstances. In Rudy Giuliani’s case, he’s just proven that it’s never too late to self immolate. At 81 years old and with an estimated net worth of $45 million, Giuliani has brought the wheels of his local state bar grinding down relentlessly upon him. Giuliani may have been America’s mayor at one point, he may have sought the presidency, he may have coveted the position of Attorney General. But becoming Trump’s lapdog has brought him low.

The end of Giuliani is truly going to be Shakespearean. Bess Levin at Vanity Fair has a great comedy take on this. She suggests that maybe Rudy could see about finishing up his Associates Degree in Mortuary Science since his law career looks pretty much kaput.

Are you looking for legal representation? Were you hoping to hire an attorney with an extremely specific background, one who can say he has intimate knowledge not only of the legal field but also what it’s like to:

• Be married to one’s cousin;
• Show up in a Borat movie with his hands down his pants;
• Go on a famously deranged rant about ferrets;
• Regularly butt-dial reporters;
• Mistake the Four Seasons hotel for Four Seasons Total Landscaping;
• Hold a press conference while apparently leaking hair-dye; and
• Have his home and office raided by the feds?

Unfortunately, then, we’ve got disappointing news: as of today, Rudy Giuliani is not currently licensed to practice law. Here’s CNN with the sad story:

Rudy Giuliani, the former personal lawyer for former President Donald Trump who once held one of the legal profession’s most prestigious jobs, was suspended Thursday from practicing law in New York state by an appellate court that found he made “demonstrably false and misleading statements” about the 2020 election. In a ruling released following disciplinary proceedings, the court concluded that “there is uncontroverted evidence” that Giuliani, the former Manhattan U.S. attorney, “communicated demonstrably false and misleading statements to courts, lawmakers and the public at large in his capacity as lawyer for former President Donald J. Trump and the Trump campaign in connection with Trump’s failed effort at reelection in 2020.”

Giuliani’s “conduct immediately threatens the public interest and warrants interim suspension from the practice of law,” the court wrote. The suspension of his law license marks a precipitous fall for the former New York City mayor, once considered an accomplished and formidable force in legal circles. In recent years, however, Giuliani’s reputation has suffered as he has come under criminal investigation by the office he used to lead, the Manhattan U.S. Attorney’s office, for possible illegal lobbying. He has denied wrongdoing. “We find that there is evidence of continuing misconduct, the underlying offense is incredibly serious, and the uncontroverted misconduct in itself will likely result in substantial permanent sanctions at the conclusion of these disciplinary proceedings,” the court wrote. […]

In a hilarious bit of irony, Giuliani was scheduled to appear in a D.C. court on Thursday for proceedings in a defamation suit against him from Dominion Voting Systems, which is suing him and others for claiming the company was responsible for election fraud.

And then Trumpty Dumpty chimed in, as if things weren’t ridiculous enough.

“Can you believe that New York wants to strip Rudy Giuliani, a great American Patriot, of his law license because he has been fighting what has already been proven to be a Fraudulent Election? The greatest mayor in the history of New York City, the Eliot Ness of his generation, one of the greatest crime fighters our Country has ever known, and this is what the Radical Left does to him. All of New York is out of control, crime is at an all-time high—it’s nothing but a Witch Hunt, and they should be ashamed of themselves. TAKE BACK AMERICA!”

We’ve got a lot of Eliot Nesses running around. Just the other day Matt Gaetz was making noise about taking down both the DOJ and the FBI, because he’s playing Eliot Ness.

No, Rudy is toast. Rudy is the kind of toast that you would find in a kitchen on a rocket ship that had crashed into the sun. That kind of toast. Toast at the subatomic  particle level, toast.

George Conway was quoted as saying that the “only way Giuliani is going to see the inside of a courtroom again is as a defendant.”