Sorry Noelle, you can’t split hairs. It’s a binary choice.

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See-saw, Marjorie Daw. Jackie shall have a new master   English nursery rhyme

For a long time I thought that the hardest job in the world was being a Trump surrogate to the media. After all, you had to take the always insane, often racist shit that Trump spews and tweets on a daily basis, and spin it like a centrifuge to try to make it sound logical and sensible. Not that I felt sorry for them. That would be like feeling sorry for a guy who got busted for a DWI. Hey, they got shitfaced, let ’em pay the price.

But I have come to change my opinion on that subject, and have come to realize that the people with the hardest job in the world are the surrogates for, or members of the “sane” Republican party, who are forced to twist themselves like a circus contortionist to explain that they are Republicans, and that Donald Trump is not a Republican. GOP strategist Noelle Nikpour came right out and said it on MSNBC today, “I’m a Republican, and Donald Trump doesn’t represent the Republican party.”

Poor baby. Noelle, I like you as a person, and I admire your tenacity, but you’re wrong. That may be what you and your delusional brethren tell yourselves to get through these long, cold, dark nights, or to assuage the shame you feel when talking to non Republicans who know your pedigree, but it’s just not true. And I can prove it.

Donald Trump is a Republican because he is President of the United States, elected as a Republican, and is the head of your party. Hell, you don’t even have to be president, the minute a candidate becomes the presidential nominee, he or she becomes the de facto leader of the entire party. I remember when y’all GOP critters were doubled over in mirth when we Democrats were saddled with idjits like Hubert Humphrey, George McGovern and Mike Dukakis. Well, the shoe is on the other foot now, so enjoy that mile long walk. At least we Democrats could console ourselves with the fact that these ballot mice didn’t actually get elected and fuck up the country!

There’s another way that I can prove that Der Gropinfuror is a Republican, and it’s fact based and scientific. The latest polling shows that Donald Trump enjoys a 90% popularity rating in the Republican party! Did you hear that Noelle, you and the rest of the sad little outcasts out there still trying to have it both ways, the Republican party, your party, by your own admission. If that polling is correct, you and your whinerbag friends only comprise a measly 10% of the GOP! Honorable men like Charlie Sykes, George Will, and David Jolly can excoriate Trump all they want, at least they did the stand up thing and left the party, but the rest of you are still Reptards, and Donald Trump is your man.

Oddly enough, I can relate, because the Democrats recently went through the same thing, but for the polar opposite reason. When Barack Obama was elected, the Democrats faced the same issue, but in reverse. Obama was not the shame of the Democratic party, he was the paragon of the Democratic party, everything a Democrat could strive to be. Intelligent, charismatic, well spoken, studious, caring, he reshaped the Democratic party by his simple existence as a Democrat. In 2016 the Democrats faced a crisis. Basically, how do you put on the warm up act after the Rolling Stones concert? The Democrats ended up nominating a “legacy”candidate, and one of the reasons that Bernie Sanders did so well was that Democrats couldn’t tolerate the thought of going back to business as usual. They had seen the Promised Land, and it wasn’t in the past.

Which is what is going to make 2024 so absolutely fascinating for a political junkie like me.Whether Trump wins or loses in 2020, 2024 is going to usher in the post Trump era. Who does the GOP nominate? Do all of the die hard Trumpaholics just quietly crawl back under their rocks and gnaw on old chastity belts without Glorious Bleater to enthrall them? And even if they do, do enough turncoat “establishment” Republicans return to the fold to nominate a serious challenger? You guys thought that the 2016 Democratic primaries were a thigh slapper in terms of electability, let’s just wait and see what kind of a dream team you guys come up with 5 years from now.

So I’m sorry, but you’re wrong Noelle. Either you’re a Republican, and Donald Trump is your leader, or you leave the Republican party, it’s a binary choice. Because, while Barack Obama remade the face of the Democratic party in his image, so has Donald Trump remade the Republican party in his. The name Donald Trump will be synonymous with the words Republican party for generations. And I can prove it. Noelle, does the name George Wallace ring a bell?

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1 COMMENT

  1. These days I follow Stuart Stevens–former manager of Mitt Romney’s 2012 presidential campaign, now in exile–and bow-howdy, does that man excellent at scathing/disgusted/outraged/sad/whatever when tweeting his dismay over how thoroughly his party’s base has slipped the leash. He’s a great writer, though, and I know his family, all of them excellent people who left the GOP during the Bush years, and then had the foresight to die with honor after enjoying a peaceful old age. My issue with Stuart and other Never-Trumpers is this: they had no problem with racism as long as it sounded thoughtful and civilized; they promoted family values while making it harder than ever for families to survive, and waxed pious about deficits until they wrested the Treasury from the Democrats, at which point all bets were off and deficits no longer mattered. IOW, these Republicans may have genuinely believed their own press, but when push came to shove and their party was in power, they joined in the fun and made a lot of money off it. Still, if you ever want a better-than-average schadenfreude experience, give Stuart Stevens’ tweets a try. Like I said, he writes really well.

      • For some of the Republican OG, the architects of the then-modern GOP, it’s a horrifying look into the abyss, and according to Neitzche, (sp? Forgive me, it’s been a long-ass week) when you look into the abyss, the abyss looks back at you.

    • Listening to their laments is a reassuring experience. I find it doubtful that without such people, the GOP has much of a future in this current incarnation.

      • Personally, as I’ve said before, I don’t that the GOP HAS a future in its current iteration…Trump has forever stained the two words “Republican party”…Even once Trump is gone, and even if his raggedy ass band of followers go with him, like a rock band abandoning a trashed hotel room, the GOP will bow be known as the “batshit crazy” party…Not only because of Trump, but because the other, presumably “sane” members of the party submitted so weakly and slavishly to him…COnservatives are going to need to create a new phoenix to arise from the ashes…

        • Pretty much my take, Murf…there really is nowhere else for them to go with the current arrangement. The literal “old guard” is going to fall off in droves going into next decade. Younger conservatives are giving Trump and the Republican label a wide berth. And, most critically to my mind, the big money that’s powered them is finally drying up or backing away (see NRA). Russian hacking and GRU troll farms can only offset so much.

  2. As much as I can sympathize with them and am willing to work with them, I have zero pity for the sane Republicans got here. While you can trace the roots of this poison to Nixon or Reagan, the reason they wound up with someone like Trump was directly caused by the creation of the Tea Party. It was meant to be shock troops against Obama and the ACA. It turned into one-stop shopping for Trump to get all the support he’d ever need. No one pities Dr. Frankenstein after his monster’s wrecked the village.

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