CORRECTION: 1:25 p.m. PST — The original story was strange enough, but this is even weirder still. Lauren Boebert made up the story about the man who was allegedly beaten to death outside her restaurant. She did so as a smoke screen to explain why she and her employees had to start carrying guns, to protect against the purported lawlessness of the streets. Colorado Sun:
But there is some truth-bending in how Shooters became an armed food emporium. In a story Boebert has made an integral part of her personal lore in speeches and interviews, she has often repeated that she decided to arm herself and her waitresses because she feared for everyone’s safety after a man was “murdered” in the alley behind her new restaurant.
“There was a violent altercation in our back alley where a man was physically beaten to death and it immediately prompted the question, ‘How will I defend my people?’ So, I began to carry that day,” Boebert told the Durango Herald last year.
The Rifle Police Department has no record of such a murder. A man did die on the sidewalk down the street from Shooters in the early morning of Aug. 22, 2013. Initially, it was investigated as a possible homicide, but an autopsy determined the man died from a drug overdose.
Boebert has apparently told the lie so often that she’s come to believe it. That makes sense in a disciple of Donald Trump.
If you didn’t read the original story yet, here it is.
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Man, if you thought that Douglas Adams wrote about some strange restaurants, you need to take a minute and listen to Lauren Boebert describe her place. Boebert is the owner of a restaurant in Rifle, Colorado where people have been treated for food poisoning, yep, and if the stomach cramps and diarrhea don’t kill you, there are people in the parking lot who will beat you to death with their bare hands. Seriously, this is straight from the horse’s mouth.
Lauren Boebert says someone was beaten to death outside her restaurant (a good reason to stay away!) so guns don't kill people, people kill people pic.twitter.com/PBBEylYBTj
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) March 10, 2021
Why Boebert didn’t take her Glock or one of her rifles and go out to the parking lot and save the guy, we don’t know. That’s how it’s supposed to work right? Or, is it that the only thing that can save you from a bad guy with fists is a good guy with fists? I get confused.
One thing I’m not confused about, though, I’m not going anywhere near this crazy woman’s restaurant. This is one strange piece of advertising and now it’s part of the congressional record, no less.
Maybe she should rename her place of business, from Shooters Grill to Restaurant At the End Of All Sanity.
I get confused when the gun nuts object to mere background checks. Why? Are they going to fail them? Are they all closet criminals with shady pasts? They all brag about being ordinary, peace-loving law-abiding citizens, so what’s the problem with having their backgrounds checked?
It takes time, and they might need that gun tomorrow. (My father registered an heirloom shot pistol; because BATF considers it to be a sawed-off shotgun, it requires a background check, fingerprints, the whole nine yards. He did it…the only problem was maybe remembering his military serial number, which he hadn’t needed in years.)
Fifty years ago I had a .410 pistol (my dad had acquired it in a trade for doing some amateur gunsmithing) that was pretty unusual because it had been manufactured as a .410 pistol instead of being converted using a saw off barrel & action mated to a jerry rigged pistol grip. The barrel was ten inches long and the thing had no practical use as far a I was concerned. I ran across a guy I’d worked with in college and somehow it came up in conversation. He asked if I was willing to sell it and offered me what was then a lot of money (a hundred bucks) after seeing it and given my finances at the time I happily sold it to him. I can only imagine the hoops I’d have to jump through now to legally posses such a thing. I’m sure I’d have sold it but probably for an even better price than way back in 1981! I knew it was unusual fifty years ago but would come to learn just how much of a collectors item it was since dad had cleaned it up and it was in excellent condition.
PJ,
1) Your military “serial number” is your social security number.
2) Universal background checks conducted for the purchase of a firearm are processed in a matter of minutes through the National Instant Criminal Background Check System (NICS), when purchasing a firearm from a licensed manufacturer, dealer, or importer. If there is something in your background that causes a delay, a response is still required within 3 business days.
I have rather limited computer skills but if someone who has good ones for making memes, perhaps one of Rep. Bobblehead outside her restaurant captioned: Puke Shooters! (We’ll give you food poisoning but at least you can pack heat while puking up your meal!)
Isn’t it a felony to lie to Congress?