‘I’m Donald Trump and You’re Not’ No Longer Working, At Least In Civil Court

I’m Chevy Chase and you’re not (old SNL Weekend Update gag)

I’d you’re as old as I am you recall the early years of Saturday Night Live and the “Original Not Ready For Prime Time” players/cast. Chevy Chase was the first Weekend Update anchor and his tag line opening of the segment noted above got to the point where he could say the first part and the audience would shout back the second part. It seems he took that too seriously and was a real jerk in many ways even then. So it is with Donald Trump who has since he was young believed, and worse gotten away with acting like he’s by God Donald Trump and unique in the sense that rules, even laws don’t apply to HIM.

Sure, there have been a few (very few) instances where he hasn’t gotten away with stuff and oh my how  he’s gotten bent out of shape over it. He’s famous for holding grudges over the tiniest of slights, real or merely perceived. He’s also proven a master at manipulating the legal system to avoid consequences for his misdeeds. It was the glare of the spotlight of Presidential politics that started to change things for Trump.

As we know he used it in combination of the Presidency with his knowledge and experience gained from decades of legal “running out the clock” to push consequences down the road to avoid facing the music as misdeed after misdeed was brought to light. And then not only abuses of his Office but actual crimes. Criminal accountability is yet to come as Trump has abused the legal process, especially at the appellate level to force delays. (Do you HEAR me DC Circuit?) However, on the civil side in case after case starting with his final months in office as he lost court case after court case and appeal after appeal he had judges, even some he’d appointed tell him in nice sounding legal terms to take a hike.

It was like so many basketball games I played in (and not just street games) where someone would drive into the lane and put up a shot and have some defender not just blocked it but send it flying. Sometimes into the stands. Often followed by a comment/taunt “get that weak ass sh*t outa here!” Increasingly in civil cases that’s what Trump has been experiencing. He’s gone on social media and even showed up in court some, trying to bluster and intimidate judges and they’ve pretty much been that shot-blocker with an attitude.

Trump tries to play his I’m Donald Trump and I am the law and I make the rules. As in “I’m Donald Trump and YOU’RE not.” Obey me or else. In a way it’s a real life Cartman from South Park demanding respect for his “authoritah:”

However, in civil court at least judges have increasingly made it clear they are tired of Trump bullshit. More interesting is that there’s even some almost literal “Sit down and shut up” from judges that’s started happening. Sadly, things are less so on the criminal side.

In his pending criminal trials Trump has one judge, Aileen Cannon who I so often call “Loose” Cannon who might more appropriately be called “Lost Cause” (when it comes to justice) Cannon. But the other three judges while putting up with crap from Trump NO other criminal defendant would get away with are still partially limiting his antics. More importantly they are wise to his delay tactics and doing their best to move things along.

If only appellate judges were the same. Or at least like the very, very conservative Fourth Circuit that twice took only a couple of weeks to slap down judge Cannon. They proved the system can work fast when required and since it’s not a “documents” case in Florida but a NATIONAL SECURITY one urgency was essential.  Twice they took only a couple of weeks to review briefs and rule. Boom. Done. Next case. Which again brings me to my almost daily complaints about the DC Circuit. The one that took a month and a half to rule on the gag order. And that took their sweet time just hearing the Presidential Immunity appeal and as of this writing is STILL sitting on it. Judge Chutkan had to give in to the fact there was no way in hell they were going to allow her to start Trump’s DC trial on schedule.

So as I said while when it comes to civil matters the justice system isn’t impressed by the whole “I’m Trump and you’re not” schtick (even SCOTUS) on the criminal side federal appellate judges are still somewhat cowed by it. Still, take a look how long the jury trial to determine the amount of damages in today took. In less than a week the case was done and we got a verdict hitting Trump where it really hurts – his bank account. Trump even showed up and more than once did his “I’m Donald Trump and you’re not” thing. And FEDERAL (again, hint hint DC Circuit!) judge Kaplan stared right back and more or less said “So f**king what? I’M the judge and YOU’RE Not! I make the rules in here and if you don’t like it leave. Or get out your checkbook. Or maybe some time in a holding cell would be better but sit down and STFU because you aren’t in charge in MY courtroom. I am.”

This morning I was amused by Bannon finding himself filing a motion to protect his bank records to avoid self-incrimination. That was pretty funny. Realizing this evening that in civil court at least judges no longer have any f**ks to give when it comes to Trump let’s me end my day with a smile too.