Be One Of the 200 Million To Sign Mike Lindell’s Petition To the Supreme Court, Step Right Up

I have had an epiphany and I will share it with you now, friends. Are you ready? This is it: It doesn’t matter if you know the least little thing about a subject, you can declaim endlessly upon it, as long as the people you’re talking to don’t know anything either. The stumbling block comes when those pesky people who actually know how things work in the real world show up and that’s Mike Lindell’s problem.

Lindell is becoming like a character in a Buck Rogers-esque serial. Every week he’s hanging off a cliff, with a new catastrophe in his life, but by the following week he’s figured out an angle and he’s not only back in the game, he’s got a strategy to win it, bigly.

You recall last week’s episode when Lindell proclaimed that he would get the election fraud matter before the Supreme Court by Thanksgiving. That was resoundingly laughed at, so he augmented it by telling Steve Bannon that he had eight attorneys general (which he keeps misspeaking, “attorney generals” which is a new kind of military leader, we guess, generals with JDs) and was looking to line up as many as thirty.

That brings us up to today, where not only are all the generals on board, whatever, but Lindell’s got a can’t miss way to get his case before SCOTUS and that is that he’s going to circulate a petition and collect 200 million signatures. That’ll wow SCOTUS, no doubt. Now, do the math: 74 million people voted for Trump, so all of them plus 126 million people (which is all of the people who voted for Joe Biden, plus another 45 million) are going to sign this petition. Is your head throbbing yet?

Now this is an impressive claim. I don’t care if he gets SCOTUS to hear the case or not, I want to see the petition. I can’t wait to see this thing.

MyPillow CEO Mike Lindell says he is going to launch a petition that he anticipates will easily be signed by over 200 million people in support of his election fraud claims to be heard before the Supreme Court. pic.twitter.com/O0P2VbN6jI

— Zachary Petrizzo (@ZTPetrizzo) September 30, 2021

Now all this sounds good if you don’t know how any of this works. It sounds most compelling, in fact. Just get enough signatures and the big boys and girls will take you seriously. What Lindell and his pals don’t know is that the vast majority of cases which the Supreme Court hears are cases coming up the ladder from lower courts. The Court does have limited original jurisdiction, to wit: “in all cases affecting ambassadors, other public ministers and consuls, and those in which a state shall be party.”

I suppose that if all of the attorneys general that Lindell has lined up sue somebody — who, Joe Biden? — on behalf of their state, that that could get it before the Court, theoretically, but you may recall Ken Paxton already tried that. Paxon sued battleground states for unconstitutional changes to 2020 election laws and he got laughed at. If Lindell had even one AG really lined up it would be Paxton and you’ve heard squat about that, right?

Not that I should even take the time to dignify this idiocy with any kind of factual commentary, but the point is, if this fantasy bubble of Lindell’s is so easy to burst, why hasn’t anybody close to him told him?

So here we are, watching this for entertainment, because that is totally its breadth and scope. And everybody else on this planet, who is following this at all, knows this except Mike Lindell. The rest of the world is laughing that a housewares manufacturer is going to do an end run around both the constitution and the best legal minds in the country. What’s that old expression, “Fools rush in, where wise men fear to go?”