So what is it with kisses anyway? I thought they were supposed to be all warm and romantic and shit. But look at history and popular culture. Christ was betrayed to the Romans with a wet one from Judas. And in all of those mob movies, it’s always a kiss on the cheek that indicates it’s time for a fishing trip on Sheepshead Bay with a juke god tied around your ankles. I’m starting to think that kisses are greatly overrated.
Yes, this is actually pertinent to a current news event. After saying all sorts of nasty stuff about El Pendejo Presidente while polling 0%, Lindsey Graham has been nothing if not a faithful soldier. He is a frequent golf partner of Trump, which means suspending math where scoring is concerned, he has backed Trump over every insane, inflammatory thing he says, and is even willing to die on the hill of Muellergate in his judiciary committee. And how does Trump repay hid faithful minion?
Over the weekend Trump formally announced by Twitter his endorsement for Graham in the upcoming election. This news was immediately jumped on by the campaign. No not the Graham campaign, they’re all sitting around like their cell phone coverage crapped out. It was immediately pounced on by Democrat Jamie Harrison’s campaign, which sent out a national text message blast asking for cash to combat Trump’s evil influence, while touting a poll that has the race tied at 42-42.
This is going to be a real problem for vulnerable GOP incumbents, and it’s a no win situation for them. Trump is about as toxic as Chernobyl right now. He has totally botched the coronavirus pandemic response, and that’s hanging like an anchor around his neck. His heavy handed, dictatorial handling of the civil unrest in the wake of the George Floyd murder has everybody who’s still healthy pissed off at him, and his insistence, along with that of his moron son in law in touting the recovering stock market as proof that all is well with the economy again, at a time when 40 million people are laid off is only stressing the point that there are actually two economies out there, and Trump is interested in the wrong one. A recent poll showed Trump finally crashing through his previously sturdy floor of 40% in popularity, and coming to rest at 38%.
Recently vulnerable GOP incumbents have taken to what I like to call the 100 meter dash strategy when it comes to dealing with Trump fallout. They literally run down the hall with their heads down, mumbling Sorry, I have to take this call as they steam by reporters. This is like trying to decide which is better, being swallowed whole by the shark, or being bitten in half by the shark. If Trump feels they’re not being supportive enough, he slams them on Twitter, which costs them his base. But if he smiles gently on them and endorses them, their opponents slam them over the head with the endorsement. Reap what ye sow, jerk offs!
And it’s not just the vulnerable Senate incumbents who are in the soup, the GOP House incumbents are no better off. It was reported over the weekend that His Lowness is steaming full speed ahead on holding a mass rally somewhere, some time in the next two weeks. Trump is jonesing for that fix so bad right now that his makeup is clumping from the sweat. Where does he end up, and how badly does it hurt whomever was already there?
To be sure, there are still deep red places where Trump is still King Shit, but even then placement is crucial. If he lands in a place with a large metropolitan area, or a dense suburban population, he’ll only drive further away those suburban GOP voters who ditched him in 2018. Does Thom Tillis in North Carolina want to be seen on stage right now with Trump, unmasked, while the state’s coronavirus is spiking, and threatening to turn North Carolina into the New York City of the south? Does Martha McSally want to be anywhere near a stage with Trump in Arizona right now, with the virus threatening to overrun the hospitals, and freakin’ Doctors Without Borders hard at work on the Navajo nation? Does any suburban House incumbent in Florida want to share a stage with Trump, with a large elderly population and daily new highs in reported cases? Or does he have a Brazilian Bikini Wax appointment that he just can’t break?
This isn’t the first time that this has happened. In the 2006 midterms, as well as the 2008 general election then President George W. Bush pretty much left Air Force One parked in the garage, knowing how toxic he was. He preferred to take one for the team instead of indulging in one final victory lap with the crowds, to give his incumbents a chance to survive. The thing is, Bush Lite wasn’t running for reelection, he was termed out. But the funny thing is, with Trump it’s not really about his reelection. As with everything Trump, it’s all about his ego, and he doesn’t care who he takes down as long as he gets his jolt.
You know what never fails to bring a smile to my face, and a chuckle to my throat? Cast your mind back to January of 2017. Trump had just been sworn in, and Moscow Mitch McConnell, looking at the map that the Democrats had to defend in 2018 was talking covetously about creating a permanent GOP majority in the Senate. And now here it is, three short years later, and McConnell himself may not survive. And even if he does, his majority may not. Pucker up them lips Donnie Depends, and start spreading the love!
To know the future, look to the past.before the insanity of the 2020 election, relive the insanity of the 2016 GOP primary campaign, and the general election, to see how we got to where we are. Copies of President Evil, and the sequel, President Evil II, A Clodwork Orange are available as e-books on Amazon, at the links above. Catch up before the upcoming release of the third book in the trilogy, President Evil III: All The Presidents Fen
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