Drunk Rudy Giuliani Just Said He’d Testify, and Said More …

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Well now, this is weird.

So Rudy got A-rated drunk last night, obviously, and made the decision to get in front of the cameras and make word-like noises from his mouth. But it sounded to me like he absolutely would testify, and then he sort of threw his client into the mosh pit (I’m tired of “under the bus,” my New Year’s resolution is not use it once this year).

One of the nice things about not drinking at all anymore (I had plenty to drink up till age 30, and am not thirsty these days), is that I wake up clear-headed enough to know that this is so very strange:

I believe he just said that he would try Trump on Racketeering, which he practically invented (according to him, which is ironic because that’s precisely what I believe he could be charged with). His brag was about on the level how he invented water, which is all he should be drinking these days.

Now, this morning, I anticipate that he will get up sober (sort of) and state that what he meant was that he would try the case in defense of Trump – if Trump had the courage to let him – and that the defense would be he would charge Schiff, Pelosi, Biden and Obama for racketeering. And that’s all fine, as a private citizen, he can “charge” whomever he wants with a crime and the paper will get thrown in the garbage by the court clerk, or they’ll just hit “delete” if Rudy is modern enough to use the e-filing systems.

Regardless, Rudy has had a bad night and ought to have a bad morning, since the boss will have heard. He will likely have almost as bad a morning as me. This column is late because I’ve been trying to fix my riding mower, and … it’s still not fixed. I use too many four letter words as it is (according to my wife), and so we’ll leave it at that.

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Peace, y’all

Jason

jmiciak@yahoo.com and on Twitter @MiciakZoom

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17 Comments on "Drunk Rudy Giuliani Just Said He’d Testify, and Said More …"

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greenharper
Guest

“If you give me the case, I will prosecute it as a racketeering case….” Hubris. Overweening hubris.

chris whitley
Member

I will nail that bastard trump to the barn door. Oh you say he’s my client. Never mind. I will get him off, I think?

Linda
Guest

Thanks jason!!! Love reading your columns !!!! You speak truth!!!

mae
Member

Rudy is really helpful, actually.

Bareshark
Guest

Every day Rudy is alive is another day I know that Trump is anything but the real gangsta he sees himself as.

CAZ
Guest

Mutual Assured Destruction

chris whitley
Member

He wants to testify, sign him up! McConnell probably go for it and Rudy would be sure to throw trump under the bus.

Liz
Guest

I don’t think Rudy was inebriated. That’s just Rudy.

p j evans
Member

I didn’t know Rudy still had a law license.
ETA: when was the last time he even opened a law book?

Nancy M Parker
Guest

He should have been disbarred for a number of things recently, but AFAIK he hasn’t been.

Markm Mitchell
Member

Have a great 2020, Jason, and thank you for the articles.