This proposition makes just as much sense as what the bankrupt realtor from Queens came up with yesterday — in many ways, more. The New Yorker:
COPENHAGEN (The Borowitz Report)—After rebuffing Donald J. Trump’s hypothetical proposal to purchase Greenland, the government of Denmark has announced that it would be interested in buying the United States instead.
“As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale,” a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. “We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime, pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale.” […]
A key provision of the purchase offer, the spokesperson said, would be the relocation of Donald Trump to another country “to be determined,” with Russia and North Korea cited as possible destinations.
If Denmark’s bid for the United States is accepted, the Scandinavian nation has ambitious plans for its new acquisition. “We believe that by giving the U.S. an educational system and national health care, it could be transformed from a vast land mass into a great nation,” the spokesperson said.
God knows that Prince Hamlet dealt with some corrupt people, in a court where backstabbing was the order of the day — literally. But even he never encountered the likes of Donald Trump. We’re ready for Denmark, but is Denmark ready for us?
And here’s a thought, while we’re restructuring global alliances: How about when the UK leaves the European Union on Halloween, if it becomes an American colony? Turnabout is fair play, that sort of thing.
[Editor’s Note: Andy Borowitz writes satire for the New Yorker.]